A President’s Out-of-Body Experience

Renzi received a bill from the veterinarian, then remembered about the incident where Ha-cube bit the poodle. Since he was already outside, he gave He Jun a call. He Jun was also free, and they agreed to meet at a nearby cafe. When He Jun came, he looked fatigued. He was not wearing his usual linen clothes, but was instead dressed in a simple t-shirt. His hair was also not in a bun, only tied in a ponytail with a cap. When He Jun politely removed the cap, Renzi discovered that He Jun even had makeup on.

Renzi laughed, “Dressed so nicely today, going to a party?”

He Jun laughed too. “A party in the day? It’s work, actually.”

Curious, Renzi asked. “Aren’t you a tea specialist?”

He Jun smiled and brushed away his hair by his forehead. “That’s only a part-time job. Actually, I’m a professional model — ah, of course, looking at the amount of work I have and my income, I also might not be considered a professional.”

Renzi was a little surprised. “You’re a model? Oh, this line of work is pretty tough. But your looks are so good, I’m sure you’ll make it.”

He Jun sighed. “There are so many people of similar standards to me.”

Not good at comforting people, Renzi could only try to change the topic. “So how’s your dog?”

“It’s doing pretty well.” He Jun smiled.

He Jun and Renzi did not spend too much time talking about their dogs before He Jun skilfully diverted the topic to Gu Xiaoshan. Again, without being on guard, Renzi mentioned some things about him before thinking, why are we talking about Brother Xiaoshan again? He felt rather indignant and sour, “You seem quite concerned about Brother Xiaoshan.”

He Jun nodded, “That’s right.”

He Jun’s candidness made Renzi speak directly. “Then, there’s really nothing going on between the two of you?”

He Jun was quite dejected about it, but he still smiled, “I wish we did.”

He was too honest, and it confirmed Renzi’s thoughts. Renzi smacked the table, “As expected! I knew it! The two of you really have something going on!”

He Jun smiled wryly, and repeated that sentence, “I wish we did.”

Renzi studied He Jun, “Then, do you like guys?”

He Jun was somewhat astounded, giving a nod after a pause. “Yes, is this very strange?”

Renzi quickly waved his hand, “No, no, that’s not what I meant. I’m surrounded by gays, and now I even feel that straight guys are the strange ones.”

He Jun could not resist laughing. “Oh, it’s like this!”

Blinking, Renzi bit his straw. “How did you realise you’re gay?” Then, feeling that he might have offended He Jun, he continued. “Uh, if you think that my question is too invasive…”

“It’s fine.” He Jun interrupted, smiling. “There’s nothing to hide. I’m just not interested in girls, but I’m interested in guys. It’s that simple. It’s also not difficult to realise it?”

“Oh. Then, there are many gay people around you too?”

He Jun nodded. “There’s quite a number of them in the industry, so it’s nothing special.”

Renzi continued nodding, “Ah, yes… Then, then is there anyone around you who used to be straight, and suddenly became gay?”

Hearing this, He Jun observed Renzi’s expression. He bit his lip, “It does happen…”

Renzi’s eyes brightened. “What kind of situation was that?”

He Jun’s eyes curved up in a smile. “Why are you asking about this? Are you also suddenly turning gay?”

Renzi’s face flushed.

He Jun stirred his coffee as he looked at Renzi. “This sort of situation does happen. But sometimes… it’s only a misunderstanding.”

Renzi was taken aback. “Misunderstanding?”

“Yes, misunderstanding… At the very least, a person has to be sure that he can become erected because of a man, right?”

Renzi contemplated it for a moment, he had clearly got an erection over Gu Xiaoshan, this was definitely not a misunderstanding.

Still sinking in his doubts over his sexual orientation, Renzi’s phone rang. Answering it, Old Mister Yu’s voice sounded, “Lousy kid, are you coming home for dinner tonight?”

Hearing that, Renzi knew that his dad’s temper had abated, and quickly agreed.

Returning to Gu Xiaoshan’s apartment, Renzi packed his things, feeling an emptiness in his heart. He had never left Gu Xiaoshan’s place feeling like this before. He sincerely wished to stay awhile longer by Gu Xiaoshan, and this thought overwhelmed him. When he was about to send a message telling Gu Xiaoshan that he was going home, he was extremely melancholic, feeling even more emotional than breaking up with any of his previous girlfriends.

“Maybe I was born gay.” Renzi bit at his fingernails, as he sent the text to Gu Xiaoshan. “Old Mister has asked me to go back, I’m going back now.”

Gu Xiaoshan quickly replied with an “Ok.”

Then, it was followed with another text. “Remember to take the dog along.”

By then, Renzi was already in the car. He had to ask the driver to turn back. “Ah, I really forgot about Ha-cube.”

Finally, with Ha-cube, Renzi appeared again at the Yu mansion. Ha-cube immediately became frisky when it reached the garden, and was uncontrollable. Renzi also did not have the mood to control it, and let it messed around. The housekeeper came by to let him know that dinner was ready, and invited Renzi to the dining table. Renzi discovered that no one else was there, just Old Mister Yu sitting by a lamp. When he called him “Dad”, Old Mister Yu only snorted in acknowledgement.

Taking a seat, Renzi asked, “Where’s Elder Brother?”

“He’s spending every night over at Zhi Xuan’s place, how would he know how to come home!”

Renzi laughed, “You can’t blame him for that, that’s how a relationship is like.”

Old Mister Yu nodded, “You’re right, at least they’re dating properly, unlike your nonsense.”

Renzi protested, “Why is mine nonsense?”

Old Mister Yu’s temper grew, “You’re asking this? Think about it yourself! What have you done!”

“I’ve only spent some money chasing girls! I won’t chase anymore girls, ok?”

Old Mister Yu laughed in anger, “You better remember what you just said, don’t chase anymore girls!”

Renzi was determined. “I won’t chase them anymore! Never again! Girls, hah!”

With Yu Yunren’s determination and solemness, Old Mister Yu was surprised. “Really?”

Renzi nodded. “Really! I’ve thought it through!”

Old Mister Yu was curious. “What did you think through?”

“I thought it through. Last time I was ignorant, and didn’t know anything, was led into being a prodigal son by others.”

Hearing this, Old Mister Yu was moved to the point of tears. “How, how did you think this through?”

Renzi sighed, “I should have thought it through a long time ago. Suddenly looking back, and he is there, under the dim light!”

Old Mister Yu was extremely touched. “My foolish son has not only straightened his thinking out, he can even recite poems now…”

Renzi was also quite moved, thinking about his actions, it was really rather irresponsible. No wonder his dad would worry. So, Renzi explained, “I’m different now, I now know what I want. I won’t create anymore nonsense.”

Old Mister Yu grasped the key point of this conversation, and hurriedly asked, “So, what do you want now?”

Renzi was stunned, he never expected it to come to this situation.

However, he gritted his teeth, and mustered up his courage. “I now know, I don’t like girls at all!”

Old Mister Yu nearly had a heart attack hearing that. “What, what do you mean?”

Yu Yunren pounded his chest, “I finally thought things through, and understood why I had not much feelings for those girls. Breaking up with them so quickly, it’s because I don’t like girls at all!”

From the joy of thinking that “his foolish son had finally matured”, Old Mister Yu fell suddenly from it — it was like falling off a cliff, that force nearly ending this old person’s life.

Luckily, Old Mister Yu was hale and hearty, and had experienced so much of life. Breathing deeply a couple of times, he calmed down and scolded, “Don’t make such retarded jokes!”

Renzi did not expect to cause such a scene so quickly upon coming home, but he thought that since he had already taken this step, he could not retreat. He was a warrior in the name of love! So, Renzi stood up straight. “I’m not joking, neither am I retarded!”

“Just say that you’re not joking! That would be more convincing!”

Renzi solemnly spoke, “Since we’ve reached this point, I’ll just say it openly. I’ve finally realised how love feels.”

Old Mister Yu scolded, “Bullshit! How can you know how love feel? You’re still playing around!”

Renzi tried to convince him, “Just looking at him, I got an erection. I didn’t even have to touch myself. Even when dreaming, I dreamt of doing it with him, isn’t this how love feels?”

Old Mister Yu was stunned, indeed, this is really how love feels.

Old Mister Yu was quickly convinced, and had to accept the reality that another of his son was also gay.

Oh god, why?

In Old Mister Yu’s sunny world view, it started raining. He covered his face in pain, digesting this heartless truth. He even started to wonder if he might be gay himself.