Arena

“It’s genetics. Examinee Hyun-Ho Kim’s ancestors passed away from heart disease too, did they not?”

“Uh...that’s...”

I was so shocked I couldn’t even formulate a proper response. The baby angel wasn’t saying anything wrong. Father died of a heart attack. Mom had told me that even grandfather died of a heart attack so you should be careful too.

I asked with a shaky voice

“Am I really dead?”

“It’s a pity”

Flapping his wings like a little finch, the baby angel tried to console me.

It wasn’t consoling me at all.

But I’m only 29. Born as a man and I haven’t done anything.

I didn’t have a great job, and no family to look after. I’m still a virgin! If I die, what about my family?! What about mom?!

At the thought of mom, I began breaking down.

After father passed away like he did, mom raised us three kids with a lot of difficulty.

I disappointed her this way and that way but I was still her hope.

So then what happens if even I die like this?

I wasn’t able to look after her properly once.

Then was that conversation I had the night before the last conversation I’ll ever have with my mom...?

My life ends just like this?

“I can’t just die like this!”

“Right?”

“Ok. What do I have to do? You said you would give me an opportunity? If I do as you say can I live again?”

“Of course. You think I’d swindle you? I’m an angel. An angel!”

The baby angel pounded his chest with a stern face.

...It’s because he’s this kind of angel that I can’t trust him.

If a sexy lady angel had suddenly appeared, I would’ve trusted her right away.

“I’ll do whatever it takes, so save me.”

“Fine. Then do you swear that as an examinee, you will your best until the very end of all the exams?”

“Yes”

The baby angel smiled widely and clapped his hands

“Yahooooo. I congratulate you on becoming an examinee!”

“Congratulations my ass. But you just said all the exams? Are you telling me it’s not just one exam?”

“Yes. It’s just like any other exam, it’s not just one question. Like your employment exam, you have to get through different levels to get to the end.”

(TL: In Korea, you take an exam(s) and then an interview before you can get hired.)

To be hearing about that damn test again really makes me hate this bbundegi bastard.

“Isn’t that a bit extreme?”

“What is?”

“Well. I think it’s a little extreme that in order to live I have to do multiple exams where I might die!”

“Oh no. That isn’t true. Every time you finish an exam we give you a rest period of 10 days to 2 months.”

“Rest period?”

“Yes. During the rest period you may get that rest period’s amount of time back into reality”

“So speaking in easier terms, every time I clear an exam, my life extends from 10 days to 2 months?”

“That is correct”

“So then what happens if I die during an exam? Does my soul just vanish or...?”

“No, there is no such thing as that. You just end up going to the afterlife as planned. So really, you don’t lose anything.”

...yeah...there’s nothing to lose there.

“And every time you clear an exam, you get a prize. According to the prize, your life can be better than the life you had before and of course, the biggest prize comes when you have completed all the exams and you can come back to life.”

I don’t think the angel is lying to me. I mean of course he has that puny bbundegi attached between his legs, but he did call lightning from the sky. He also has wings on his back. Why would a guy like this grab me and try to trick me? I don’t know how hard the exams will be, but instead of going out so pitifully I might as well give it a shot

I will live again and see mom’s face.

“Alright then. From now on I’m going to tell you the rules of the exam. First, tell me about notepad retrieval.”

“Notepad retrieval? What is...”

BAM!

Suddenly in front of my eyes there is a board the size of a notepad

“Oh! What is this?”

In my surprise, I stared at the board hanging in the air. On the board the following things were written:

Name: Hyun-Ho Kim

Class: 1

Karma: 0

Mission: Defeat the red ape

Time limit 30 minutes 0 seconds

“What is this?”

“In order to help the examinee understand, I have written down some simple details.”

“...ok I kinda get it but what is this class and karma stuff?”

“Class is examinee Hyun-Ho Kim’s current rank. Karma, simply speaking, is your grade. So the better you do on the exam, the more points you can rack up”

“Are more points better?”

“Of course. After you clear the exam, with the karma you get you can get a prize. So the more karma you get, the bigger the prize.”

I thought carefully and asked again.

“Of the prizes I can get using the karma, are there things that will help me in later exams?”

“Well of course. You can gain good weapons, martial arts, magic, super powers. You have to use the karma well to increase you strength in order to complete all the exams.”

And at the moment, the board disappeared into thin air.

“Eh?”

“If you leave the board alone long enough, it’ll disappear on its own”

“Retrieve board”

As I said it, the board reappeared in front of my eyes

The baby angel let out a sly smile.

“The board is an etheral object. Because it is an ethereal object, it won’t get in the way and won’t be visible to other people. If you throw it anywhere, it’ll just disappear.”

“Oh really?”

I took the board and threw it. The board made a parabola and swoosh, it disappeared.

‘Oh. That’s very interesting’

However, it’s disappointing. Because it’s an ethereal object, I can’t use it as a shield or a weapon in an urgent situation.

The baby angel clapped his hands.

“Alright. Well now that you’re all caught up, let’s start the exam!”

“Wait!”

I quickly stop the angel.

“What do you mean I’m all caught up? You have to tell me what the red ape is before I do or don’t do the exam you bbundegi bastard!”

“That you’ll just have to figure out yourself.”

“WHAT? You little shit. You should tell me if it’s an animal, a plant, or a bug.”

“Yeah...just be on your way”

He flicked his cute little finger at me.

And just then, right before my eyes, appeared a shabby door.

“This is the exam door”

“The exam door?”

“If you open that door, you’ll be entering Level Two of the arena. The arena is the stage where examinee Hyun-Ho Kim will take all of your exams”

“Arena...”

“Hurry and go through the door”

The baby angel flapped his wings and pushed my shoulder.

‘Alright I get it you bastard. Your uncircumcised self trying to tell me what to do.’

(TN: Being uncircumcised is like a sign on being uncivilized.)

I take a big gulp and grab the handle to the exam door.

Screeeeeeeeeeeeeech

Through the crack of the open door, a bright light floods in.

It was so bright that I couldn’t see what was over the threshold of the door.

I hesitate for a moment and take one step and pray. 𝗳𝙧𝐞𝚎w𝗲𝚋n𝚘𝙫𝑒𝘭.𝑐om

I am hoping that when I get past this door, I will awake from this dream. I want to be able to wake up complaining and laughing about this ridiculous dream.