Crowned by the Treacherous Big Shot

The onlookers’ eyes were practically falling out of their sockets.

Wasn’t this the second grand wedding this year in Fengshui Alley?

First came a Governor’s wife.

Now, a Princess Consort.

And they said this was a cursed place?

Are we sure it’s not actually a treasure trove of good fortune?

"Li Baoren, are there any houses still for sale in the alley? I want to buy one."

"Me too!"

"Hang on, Brother Hu, Brother Zhang, you two don’t lack houses. I’m new to the Capital City and am just trying to find a place to settle down..."

Li Baoren: "Sorry, none left."

"What do you mean, ’none left’?"

Li Baoren explained, "Just that — all the houses here have been bought!"

The buyer was Meng Qianqian.

Granny Feng and Uncle Lei valued their peace and quiet, so Meng Qianqian had bought all the vacant houses to preserve the tranquility of the neighborhood.

Looking back, that decision was absolutely right.

Princess Wanping gave her Prince Consort plenty of face, personally stepping out to welcome him. If you flipped the scenario, it was akin to the groom personally carrying the bride into the sedan chair.

According to tradition, someone should’ve blocked the door to give her a hard time, but no one had the guts for it.

As Ji Li emerged from the alley, the crowd let out a deafening cheer, even louder than for Princess Wanping.

"The Prince Consort is so handsome!"

"The Princess Consorts of Princess Anyang and Princess Chengyang are also considered dashing, but compared to Princess Wanping’s Prince Consort, they don’t hold a candle."

Ji Li liked hearing that.

He snapped open his folding fan with a flourish and climbed gracefully onto the phoenix carriage.

Meng Qianqian, watching his pretentious antics, couldn’t help but whisper to Princess Wanping, "What exactly do you see in him?"

Without hesitation, Princess Wanping replied, "He’s good-looking, easy to feed, and doesn’t covet anything of mine."

He could only earn five copper coins a day, and even if she gave him pocket money, he couldn’t hide it. If he tried, he’d get struck by lightning.

Anyone who dared to take more from her would also have to face a bolt from the blue.

Compared to those black-hearted Prince Consorts who schemed for the princess’s dowry — or worse, couldn’t wait for the princess to die — someone like Ji Li was one in a million.

"Since I have to marry a Prince Consort, I might as well marry him. At least he’s straightforward."

Meng Qianqian blinked. "Are you saying... Ji Li’s a bit of an idiot?"

Princess Wanping: "...Don’t insult my Prince Consort like that."

-

The grand wedding created a buzz throughout the Capital City.

The crowds lining the streets to welcome them outnumbered those on the day of the Emperor and Empress’s own wedding.

Come to think of it, it wasn’t surprising. One was a legitimate princess on the verge of becoming an old maid, and the other was a mysterious member of the Twelve Guards. Who wouldn’t want a glimpse of the two?

No one had expected much from their looks, and yet they were blown away all the way there.

The princess was stunningly beautiful, like a heavenly maiden, while the Prince Consort was a breathtaking celestial presence. Together, they truly were a match made in heaven.

The two entered the palace to pay their respects.

Eunuch Fu: "First bow: To Heaven and Earth—"

The Supreme Emperor couldn’t contain his joy.

Finally, the old maid was married off at last.

Princess Wanping and Ji Li bowed to the heavens and earth.

Eunuch Fu: "Second bow: To the parents—"

The couple turned to face the Supreme Emperor.

Princess Wanping bowed without hesitation.

Ji Li, however, felt uneasy. He was cursed; anyone he called family typically met an untimely death. The last person he acknowledged as an uncle died the very next day.

By now, the grass on the man’s grave was probably seven feet tall.

Thankfully, nothing happened after his trembling bow to the Supreme Emperor.

Eunuch Fu: "Third bow: To each other as husband and wife—"

The husband and wife bowed to each other without incident.

Ji Li thought to himself, "Could Little Yin Hu have been right? Maybe only the Imperial Family can suppress my cursed Life Chart?"

With all the ceremonies complete, the couple headed back to the Princess Mansion.

"Hahaha! So you’re Wanping’s Prince Consort? Dear brother-in-law, from now on, we’re family!"

A magnificently dressed man approached, grinning from ear to ear.

Princess Wanping introduced him, "This is my third brother."

Ji Li cupped his hands in a polite bow: "Greetings, Third Brother."

Crack!

A tree branch, heavy with snow, snapped off and came crashing down, knocking the Prince unconscious.

The Third Prince was left bleeding from the head, twitching, frothing at the mouth, and rolling his eyes wildly—

Ji Li: "Turns out, not just any member of the Imperial Family can suppress my curse..."

The Princess Mansion was bustling with a grand feast, filled with esteemed guests and an air of celebration.

Princess Wanping retired to the bridal chamber to rest a bit.

Meng Qianqian came to visit her: "Princess, what are your plans next?"

Princess Wanping gave her a curious look: "Naturally, the bridal chamber."

Meng Qianqian froze. "B-Bridal chamber?"

That wasn’t what I was asking! I meant the earlier story, the story!

Princess Wanping replied matter-of-factly, "After the formal bows, the next step is the bridal chamber. Isn’t that how it goes?"

Meng Qianqian stammered, "You’re serious?"

Princess Wanping looked puzzled. "Is this something to joke about?"

Meng Qianqian: "..."

Princess Wanping gazed deeply at her. "Don’t tell me... you two had a fake wedding?"

Meng Qianqian responded with utmost seriousness, "How could that be? My husband and I are perfectly in sync and completed our marital union ages ago!"

Princess Wanping summoned a female official to fetch a blue-and-white porcelain jar of preserved fruits: "These are for warding off the cold. I’m not a fan of ginger tea, so I had the Imperial Physician make ginger pills instead. You gave me your hand warmers earlier on the way here, so you must be chilled to the bone. I don’t want to owe you one."

Meng Qianqian tried one pill. "It’s so spicy."

The strong taste of ginger immediately warmed her frozen limbs.

Princess Wanping handed the jar to her. "Take them with you. Just don’t overeat — they can make you overheated."

"Thank you, Princess."

Meng Qianqian hugged the ginger pills jar, nibbling away at them.

Seeing her devour them non-stop, Princess Wanping hesitated a moment before saying, "...Why are you still here?"

Meng Qianqian: "Are you kicking me out?"

Princess Wanping: "What else? Planning to stay and watch me consummate my marriage with the Prince Consort?"

Meng Qianqian clutched the jar tightly and quickly exited.

The female official returned with another jar of preserved fruits, puzzled. "Princess, this jar is the one with the ginger pills. The one you gave Young Madam Lu just now was—"

Princess Wanping casually replied, "Carefree Pills."

The Carefree Pills were a stimulant, meant to enhance the wedding night experience and alleviate the pain of consummation. Though harmless, their potency was quite intense and best consumed sparingly.

The female official hesitated. "You only needed to give her one or two, so why did you hand over the whole jar?"

Princess Wanping waved it off. "What? I’m a princess and can’t spare a jar of Carefree Pills? Besides, I did warn her not to overindulge."

Meng Qianqian, clutching the jar, continued eating as she walked: "So delicious."

She munched her way through half the jar in no time.