Harry Potter: A Certain Ancient Rune Professor of Hogwarts (TL)

Luna Lovegood opened her eyes and stared at the ever-shifting clouds in the sky, the pure sunlight shining on her face through the gaps in the Brazilian rainforest, the air was fresh and refreshing. Her husband, Rolf Scamander, was taking photos of a plant two kilometers away. A small bug crawled on her.

They had been in this rainforest for three months, looking for what the locals described as a “glowing bird that flies in a rainbow”, which an eight-year-old boy claimed to have seen with his own eyes at the river, but unfortunately, it vanished in the blink of an eye. The source was absolutely reliable, but it was impossible to tell if it was true or not. It could be that the boy had a momentary lapse of vision and mistakenly made a link between a rainbow and some kind of beautiful bird he couldn’t name( such as a toucan), but they still showed up nevertheless, treating it as their honeymoon trip.

They searched the nearby waters and ponds, and only found some beautiful feathers and a few blue gemstones. Now those feathers and gems are kept in a small box along with the dirigible plum earrings, cork necklace, and pebble diadem. In the words of Rolf, “you should accommodate the aesthetics of ordinary people and have one or two pieces of normal jewellery.”

Luna inhaled the rich scent of grass and earth and drifted off to sleep. Sometime later, she was awakened by the whistling sound of an Intruder Charm, and it was Rolf Scamander, who had returned carrying a camera and a thick book.

“Found another endangered wild plant,” Rolf said, “left a detector close by for the local environmental protection department to pay a visit.” He looked at his wife who bounced up from the ground and couldn’t help but frown, “You’re lying on the ground again …”

Luna hastily took out the wand tucked inside the thick hair at the back of her head and pointed it at herself, a white mist evaporated from her dew-soaked clothes, as she spun around in place with great enthusiasm and bounced twice.

“How about now?”

“Fine.” Rolf muttered in a small voice.

The two began to pack their tent, today is the last day of their stay in the rainforest, and both were a little reluctant to leave this place. Halfway through packing their things, they sat down in the middle of their big bags and flipped through a thick photo album.

“This is the local village and its residents …”

“I like them, they love to tell jokes.” Luna interjected.

“That’s right, one joke per three sentences. Here’s a picture of me playing football with them, and look, how happy they are! That’s a victory smile, I think if it had been Quidditch I might not have lost so badly … you were studying their weaving techniques on the side … so who exactly was taking the pictures … anyway I feel it’s necessary to remind you that the locals use this technique to make fishing tools, not to weave vines onto their bodies …”

“At the Wizard’s Tavern, we met two new wizard friends from Castelobruxo and one of them insisted on cursing my little thumb, nice stunning spell back there dear …”

“A toucan wandered into the tent, but ended up getting scared off by a magic lamp.” ƒ𝑟𝐞𝗲𝘄𝙚𝚋𝑛ｏ𝙫𝒆𝒍.𝒄𝘰𝓂

“Next several magical creatures unique to Brazil, all discovered by you first, how strange, it reminds me of our first meeting.”

He clicked his tongue and flipped the album forward, skimming over nearly a third of the wedding photos and stopping at the very first few pages.

Two heads came together. Luna, a few years younger than she is now, is crouched on the ground, reaching out to pet a creature that looks a lot like a ferret, the little fellow munching on a steaming hot dog, with its eyes narrowed pleasantly. The background is a snowy, glacial landscape.

“Seriously, I’ve spent two years searching the Arctic,” Rolf said sourly, “and ended up with nothing, so I strongly suspected that my grandfather had omitted some crucial information … Nevertheless, I didn’t exactly return empty-handed. ”

Luna hummed happily from the side a tune that sounded like a piece composed by the Weird Sisters twelve years ago – ‘A Great Victory’.

Rolf hummed a couple of lines along.

Near noon, they walked out of the Brazilian rainforest with two suitcases, one large and one small. After Rolf handed over a thick stack of photos to a local wildlife preservation group, the two made their way to the border, where they registered and returned to England via a Portkey.

“Wizards are truly born explorers.” A cross-border patrol officer said.

“We always have been.” Rolf replied.

“Hey, I’m talking about the one who landed on Mars.” The officer teased.

…

On the hills near the Ottery St Catchpole village, the grass was rippled by the wind in a large circle and a small house that looked like a tipped Rook was in sight.

“My dear daughter! You are back.”

Xenophilius Lovegood ran out of the house to embrace Luna, who gently patted her father on the back. Xenophilius was dressed in messy clothes, his cotton-candy-like hair haphazardly tangled into one mass like a discarded bird’s nest, and his eye problem seemed to have worsened, so he used it as an excuse to pretend he didn’t see the man next to his daughter until Rolf took the initiative to greet him, and he reluctantly gave the other man an extremely perfunctory hug.

“Sorry, I forgot your name, Rod, Roman–”

“It’s Rolf.” Luna said jovially. Xenophilius clicked his tongue, his one eye seemed to roll out of its socket, he gave his daughter’s husband a sidelong glance with his other eye, then without a word he took the suitcase from Luna’s hand and pulled her towards the black door with his other hand. Rolf Scamander shook his head and followed.

This attitude is considered good.

According to some journalist who sneaked into the wedding and was kicked out in the middle of the occasion, “The old widower Lovegood seems to have plotted to hex his son-in-law during the wedding ceremony and turn him into a big-mouthed coloured Plimpy. Too bad it didn’t succeed, or it would have hopefully contended for the biggest scoop of the week – in the presence of Mr. and Mrs. Hap, Mr. and Mrs. Potter, the Weasleys, the Longbottoms, the Scamanders, and a host of other family and friends.”

But Rolf knows that was pure nonsense, or at least not entirely true.

In contrast, he believed that Xenophilius originally intended to transform him into a horn of Erumpent, because when he first visited here as a guest, he had inadvertently broken the secret of the gift that Mr. Lovegood had given to his daughter – the gray-curved horn purchased from a smuggler’s hand, was not a horn of a Crumple-Horned Snorkack but a horn of Erumpent, which is extremely dangerous to keep at home … then he paid the price for his straightforwardness.

The interior of the house is a standard round shape, like a round pepper shaker.

The kitchen is on the ground floor, with flowers, insects, and birds painted on the stove, sink, and cupboards. Up a cast-iron revolving staircase, the second floor is a more disorganized living room and studio, where an old printing machine occupies the best light and position, and the other places are scattered with miscellaneous items – it is clear that Mr. Lovegood is not in the mood to clean up the house during his daughter’s absence. A few palm-sized, animal-shaped magic lamps flew around the ceiling. Two staircases extend upward from this floor, leading to the bedrooms of Luna and Mr. Lovegood respectively.

The three spent the afternoon sorting out the travel materials, with Mr. Lovegood still treating Rolf like air, but asking questions and caring about Luna, and showing a surprising amount of curiosity about all sorts of interesting details that happened on the trip.

“Oops, is that so … This seems to validate a certain theory.”

Luna’s observation skills amazed the two men present, and Rolf felt somewhat sorry that these brilliant perspectives would only appear in the unreliable magazine “The Quibbler”, and be published alongside bizarre tales of flame elves, quivering maggots, and life on Mars.

That last one doesn’t exactly count.

When Mr. Hap and Mrs. Granger returned from Mars, the answer to this question did not matter, as people plunged into a wild fantasy, obsessing over the topic of possible immigration to an alternative planet in their lifetimes, and it took them a long time to realize that the next closest point of Mars to Earth would not be until 2018.

In the subsequent years, six space stations have been established on the moon.

Luna abruptly looked up at the ceiling.

“We have about a thousand people above our heads.” She said.

“I’m really worried those people will fall off,” Xenophilius said, “but if they can sit on a flying broom …”

In the evening, Mr. Lovegood was in a good mood and prepared to show off his cooking skills, when Luna suggested giving Rolf an opportunity to cook, “He has all the Lovegood family’s cooking recipes.” “Then he has taken a big advantage.” Mr. Lovegood muttered, “No one else has had a chance to see it yet, except for the Gnomes in the Garden.”

He began to talk about the last time the Haps visited the house.

“Felix Hap … is a good man, both knowledgeable and humorous, I interviewed him about what he saw on Mars, and about the Crumple-Horned Snorkacks, he said he owns two of them; on the contrary, his wife has no sense of humour… …”

Rolf worked for a while in the kitchen downstairs and peeked out from under the cast-iron stairs when Luna questioned him with a wink. “A few spices are missing, but I think I can find them all nearby.” Rolf said confidently.

After dinner, Mr. Lovegood, who had become much nicer to Rolf, said vaguely, “I can taste Pandora’s cooking after all these years, maybe it’s an illusion …”

“Mom had her vegetable garden.” Luna said in a trance.

Early the next morning, Luna and Rolf arrived at the Daily Prophet headquarters. Both of them previously penned articles for the Daily Prophet, but then Luna completely went back to the ‘family industry’, while Rolf wanted to focus more attention on the survival of magical creatures, just like his grandfather.

After exiting the editor-in-chief’s office, the two ran head-on into someone in the hallway – Rita Skeeter, a journalist who is passionate about writing articles of a defamatory nature.

Rita Skeeter glanced at the two from above her jewel-encrusted, rectangular glasses, “Let’s see … Luna Lovegood, Rolf Scamander, rising stars in the magizoologist community, worked together brilliantly even before they got married … the wedding was so rushed, that I haven’t had a chance to congratulate the two of you.”

“That’s because you came uninvited and were evicted.” Rolf said seriously.

“Good materials are hard to come by.” Skeeter waved her hand, “The big shots gathered, so of course, I had to find a way to blend in. The last time I had this opportunity was two years ago, but that time I didn’t dare to make a small move … have you heard of it?”

“Heard of what?” Rolf asked with confusion.

“The big events that I have been eyeing in the recent years were just too dull, but…the.” Skeeter’s face reddened slightly, her long nails piercing into the crocodile leather purse in her hand.

“The Quidditch World Cup.” Luna abruptly said.

Skeeter glanced at her, “That’s right, the 426th Quidditch World Cup held on the floating island in July 2010. But I’ve dug up something even bigger, something that will absolutely blow everyone’s mind, more explosive than Felix Hap marrying one of his former students.” She deliberately lowered her voice in the last sentence and when she finished, she furtively looked around the hallway, as if she was afraid of being overheard, and then she warned them, “This is something that should not be discussed outside of this area.”

“Is there anything that I can’t discuss?” Luna asked curiously.

Rolf tugged on his wife’s sleeve, and Rita Skeeter grunted twice, her sharp eyes flicking over her, landing on the food box in Luna’s hand. She said provocatively, “If I have to be honest, to become Luna Lovegood’s husband you first have to have a stomach of iron, and according to the reliable information I have obtained, her nickname when she was in school was ‘Loony’ She was also happy to feed Centaur and Acromantula.”

“That’s false information,” Rolf Scamander said seriously as he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around his wife like a real man, “Luna didn’t show any special interest towards Acromantula, and, most of the time, I’m the one who cooks. Do you want to know the secret ingredient?”

Rita Skeeter stared at him without speaking.

“Just keep a few special spices on hand, I discovered this when we first went to her house, because it just so happens that I like it too.”

Rita Skeeter left on her high heels, looking furious. A smile appeared on Rolf Scamander’s face as he looked down at his wife and found her looking at him, unblinking and straight.

“So Mom put spices in it when she cooked?” Luna asked, “Dad tried to make it many times, but it didn’t work.”

“I guessed that, after seeing it in the garden when I visited our house back then, and your family is very tolerant of weeds.” Rolf Scamander said. He gazed at the slightly bulging light silver-white pupils and asked softly, “Luna? Has anyone ever told you that you have beautiful eyes?” 𝘧𝘳𝐞𝚎𝑤ℯ𝘣𝗻𝘰ѵℯl.c𝐨𝚖

“Yes!” Luna affirmed, “Papa, Mama, Ginny, Firenze, Vanity, Sandra, Teresa …”

“Wait, who are all those names in the latter row?”

“They’re all Centaur.”

Rolf choked for a moment, suddenly understanding how Rita Skeeter felt.

“You can compliment me about my hair.” Luna said understandingly, and Rolf couldn’t help but advise when his eyes strayed over his wife’s dishevelled, dirty blonde hair, “Honey, I think it would be a good idea for you to take care of your hair as you did at the wedding, that looked great, like flowing gold … Of course, I am not talking about that dress!”

“Which one?”

“The one with rainbow, glitter, and a silver unicorn antler diadem.”

“But I like it a lot.” Luna said with some distress.

“Ahem, it can be worn at home, but if it’s a particularly grand occasion …” Rolf said with some hesitation, his heart clenched when he saw his wife’s eyes wander… The Quidditch World Cup! Tens of millions of people! Merlin ah! O Hap! He rushed to speak.

“Honey, I’ve come up with a great idea, we should make a custom costume for the World Cup opening celebration.”

“We?”

“… Yes.” Rolf’s expression looked very miserable.

Luna frowned briefly, then she said with a grin on her face, “But, you have to dress formally – according to the general view, yes, that’s right.”

“No need, I’m determined!”

The two walked hand in hand out of the Daily Prophet headquarters building.

“Let’s go back to school sometimes.” Rolf’s voice said.

“Yeah, I miss spending time there.”

“I think If I wear the sorting hat one more time, I might find myself with Gryffindor potential …”

————–

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