How To Raise Your Regressor

As one would expect, the Minotaur had the head and tail of a bull and the torso of a man.

It towered over at 5 metres, and had one buff body, its muscles rippling on its crimson body with each of its movements.

Its crimson eyes staring at us were filled with fury and bloodlust. The golden double battle axe it was holding was still trying to hold back the beast, but its efforts were futile; the Minotaur was dead set on ending our lives today.

So yea, looks like I have to fight a goddamned Minotaur now. Shit sure went form 0 to 100 real fucking quick huh.

Since this is a Class 3 world, Minotaur should be considered a mythical beast, a monster of great power and influence, with it being treated as a deity in some cultures.

Yet here it is, guarding a mere Shadowlord.

What the hell is going on in this life? It's absolute chaos.

And I like that.

"Step back!" Azell screamed while jumping out of the way of Minotaur.

"Stay behind me." Noelle grabbed my waist and took some distance as well.

"Can Mr. Azell handle that beast?"

I'd rather ask about it now than frantically try to save his life later.

Oh wait, that'd be a win-win, actually. I'll repay my debt and then vanish from this world.

"He can take on a hundred of them at once." Noelle smiled.

Damnit.

Guess I'll have to repay the debt some other day.

Anyway, let's first figure out what the deal with this Minotaur is.

Why did it ignore its orders by going against that axe and attacking us?

If I'm guessing things correctly, which I most probably am, this dungeon is some sort of museum with the Minotaur as its Guardian.

The medallion that Azell presented before is like the ticket to this museum. It turns us into 'Official Visitors', and like any successful business, Guards don't attack their paying visitors with the intention to kill them.

But because the Minotaur is not aware of the concept called 'Verbal Conflict Resolution', the axe which it uses as a weapon also acts as the chains that bind it.

And today, the Minotaur decided to break those chains.

For what though? I don't remember dissing the Minotaur to its face so I'm not the one at fault here. 𝑓𝘳ℯ𝒆w𝘦𝘣𝙣𝘰ѵ𝘦𝚕.c𝗼𝓶

Hmm, what was their language again? Let's just use a translator.

I manipulated my mana and used it to construct a magic formation beside my right ear. The formation would tap into the System and translate the Minotaur's roars from me. 𝑓𝓇𝑒𝑒𝚠e𝘣𝓷𝘰ѵe𝑙.com

"GRAAAAGHH!"

<Kill… me…>

Wut?

"RUAAGHH!"

<I… want… to… die…>

What the actual fuck?

"And so you decided we'd be the best candidates to do that, huh? You dumbfuck!"

Hot damn, if you want to die then go jump off a cliff or something. Don't just start attacking random people hoping they'd kill you.

"Huh?" Noelle looked back at me.

"Oh, uh, nothing."

"O-okay." She turned back, focusing on the battle before us.

Oh right, Azell is fighting that mentally unstable beast.

I better ready myself so that I can help that little wanker out if shit hits the fan.

I actually find the phrase 'When shit hits the fan' quite amusing. I can't help but think about what the guy was thinking when he coined this phrase.

Wait, I got distracted.

BOOM!

The Minotaur tried to hit Azell with his axe, but the latter flawlessly dodged it so the axe only managed to hit the ground.

Wait, if the Minotaur wants to die, why is it trying to kill Azell?

I suppose it wants to die in a battle, with honour.

It's envious how it has that choice.

"Azell…"

"If you are so worried about him, you can go ahead and help Azell. I can take care of myself."

I won't go ahead and die. Pinky promise.

"Haah?" Noelle exclaimed. "And leave you, a child, alone? No thanks. Besides, like I said, Azell can take care of himself."

Fair enough, I suppose.

That's actually smart decision making on her part. Kids are stupid, and leaving them unattended in such a tense situation would be nothing but a speedrun to death because the kids will find the dumbest of ways to fuck things up.

Besides, Azell is already toying around with that Minotaur. Add Noelle into the mix and we'll get reported for bullying a local monster.

Let's focus on the battle for now.

The Minotaur swung its axe. Azell dodged it with a well-timed crouch. He swiftly got up and went in for the kill.

However, the Minotaur stepped back and pulled its axe in. The blade of the axe came for Azell's head. He ducked. Then raised his right hand and fired a wind blade.

The Minotaur parried it with its axe. Using that moment, Azell jumped back to create some distance.

Azell was playing it safe for the time being, coaxing the Minotaur to reveal what it had up its sleeve.

And he was right in doing so. His opponent was no ordinary Minotaur; it was the Guardian of the place where the next Shadowlord was resting. It was bound to be different.

The very fact that it could have a wish like 'I want to die' meant that it was much smarter than your run of the mill Minotaur.

And as if the Minotaur was a mind reader, it changed its tactics.

The Minotaur was playing aggressively till now, frequently attacking Azell with its axe and the other free hand. It even employed complicated tactics, like baiting and feinting, in order to defeat Azell.

However, now it took a big leap and jumped back, right to the place it had been standing at before.

It spun its axe to flex its incredible hand coordination- no wait, it was building up charge.

Dunno how that works, but the spinning had somehow electrically charged the axe, with electric arcs lashing out from its blades.

"Azell, retreat!" Noelle shouted.

"Brace for impact!"

Just then, the Minotaur slammed its axe on the ground with the might of a thousand beasts. The sheer force behind that blow shook the earth.

The electrics arcs exploded like a bomb. A shockwave full of lightning leaped at us, sweeping the ground, the pillars and the chandeliers away and turning them into dust.

"Stay behind me!" Noelle took something out from her pocket.

It was a small box. One of its side opened up and from it emerged a shield made of mana.

The shield spread around and formed a barrier between the shockwave and us.

"Ugh!" Despite her best efforts, Noelle was pushed back.

Since I was behind her, I was pushed back as well.

This AOE attack was actually so powerful that the shield we were hiding behind starting breaking. Looks like the shield wasn't trained enough; it didn't work well under pressure.

"Fuck!"

"…"

I suppose it's once again up to little old me to save the day.

I seriously hope that Azell and Noelle revaluate their life choices once we go back because they're about to be saved by a 12-year-old boi.