I Shaved. Then I Brought a High School Girl Home.

Translator: yuNS

Editors: Yuuki, xyi

A delicious scent tickled my nostrils.

“Hm…?”

I sluggishly opened my eyes. It was already quite bright outside. Not only that, judging by the sheer amount of light flowing in from the south, it appeared to be well past the morning hours.

“What time is it…”

I repeatedly blinked my blurry eyes and peeked at the watch on my left arm which I had left on the night before.

“Oh god, it’s already 2 o’clock…”

Scrunching my brows, I sat up from the bed.

I don’t remember at what time I got home, but judging from my clothes I must’ve been too tired to change before going to sleep.

Thank god it’s a rest day. If I had overslept this much on a work day, it’d have been no laughing matter.

…Anyway, what’s that delicious smell? I turned my eyes towards the source to investigate.

In my vision appeared a high-school girl.

It was all too sudden. My mind froze over.

The high-school girl in question stared at me for a brief moment, before waving a hand.

“Good mornin’”

“What the hell are you!!?”

I flew out of the bed and yelled. The high-school girl blankly stared at me for a moment and blinked a few times.

“Even if you ask that… I’m nothing else but a high-school girl.”

“What’s a JK doing in my house!?”

The high-school girl forced a smile.

“I got the go-ahead to stay so I stayed.”

“And who said you could stay?”

“You did, uncle.”

“I’m not an uncle.”

This time, she let out an inappropriate laugh.

“Of course you’re an uncle. That’s hilarious.”

“No it’s not. Anyway, what’s that smell? What are you making?” 𝗳𝘳𝒆𝘦𝑤𝐞𝚋𝗻𝚘𝘷𝘦𝙡.𝑐𝐨𝘮

The high-school girl standing in the room’s kitchen stepped aside, revealing the steaming pot on the stove behind her. I opened the lid, and found miso soup in-progress.

“… Miso soup.”

“I made it.”

“Don’t go around making miso soup in other people’s houses, would you.”

Hearing what I said, the high-school girl let out a long sigh.

“What? The heck are you sighing for?”

“Didn’t you tell me to make this uncle?”

“I’m not an uncle.”

Shrugging her shoulders in annoyance, the high-school girl replied in a somewhat demanding tone.

“If you’re not an uncle then what am I supposed to call you?”

“Call me whatever you want, just get out of here.”

How can she be so shameless when she’s in someone else’s home? Not to mention, why the heck is she making miso soup without so much as my permission?

“Do you not remember anything? I was in a pinch yesterday night under the lamppost when you called out to me, uncle.”

“Like I said, I’m not an unc… Wait, lamppost? Yesterday night?”

Saying that, memories of yesterday seemed to rise to the surface. I remember the long barfing trek. After that, under the lamppost near my house was…

“Ah, black panties was it?”

“What’s with that way of remembering? That’s kinda gross, just saying.”

“You were the JK sitting with your arms around your knees, weren’t you?”

“Yup.”

My memories were gradually returning to me.

I drank with Hashimoto without any regard for what came afterward. Then, I found this girl on my way home.

After that… What the heck happened after that?

I don’t really remember anything after I brought this high-school girl home. I could feel the cold sweat forming on my back.

“… I didn’t assault you or anything, did I?”

In response, the high-school girl merely stared in my direction with a somewhat graven expression.

No reply. I could feel the sweat gushing from my body.

It wouldn’t be wrong to say that yesterday was the most drunken moment in the entirely of my life. I was in absolute despair. It wouldn’t be all that strange if something did end up happening.

“…Hey, say something would you.”

As the cold sweat began to trickle, the high-school girl suddenly went “Pfft” and burst into a laugh.

“Ahaha, no no, of course not.”

“What the heck was that pause for then! I was gonna crap myself!”

“I just wanted to tease you a lil’ bit, hehe.”

With her shoulders shaking in laughter, the high-school girl continued.

“You know, I intended to let you do whatever you wanted in exchange for a place to stay, but you were the one who said ‘I’ve got no interest in brats’, you see?”

“Shit really?” Translated by yuNS @ yuNS Translations

Well done, yesterday’s me.

If I had gone with the flow and laid my hands on this high-school girl, myself from 24 hours ago would’ve turned my current self into minced meat. Despite how drunk I was, I seem to have managed to keep some level of prudence.

“That’s why I asked you ‘Is there something you want?’”

With that, she went ‘pfft’ and burst into inappropriate laughter again.

“And then you said ‘I want you to make me miso soup everyday’, you know?”

“Isn’t that the same as proposing!?” 𝗳𝒓𝚎e𝚠𝒆𝐛𝐧𝐨v𝚎Ɩ.co𝓶

I’m absolutely certain. No matter how drunk I was, I would never say that.

Judging by the high-school girl’s comical laughter, it seems that I’ve been played.

“Hey uncle.”

“I’m not an uncle.”

“What’s your name?”

“… It’s Yoshida.”

The high-school girl let out an audible ‘hmm—’.

“Yoshida-san… Mm, that’s sorta fitting.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Your face has a very ‘Yoshida-san’ feel to it, is what I mean.”

A very ‘Yoshida-san’ feel? That’s the first time I’ve heard such a thing. Is it some sense unique to high-school girls? To be honest though, I don’t really feel like going along with that.

“Are you not gonna ask for mine?”

“Not really interested.”

“Ehh~, ask wouldn’t you?”

I’ve been completely caught in this high-school girl’s pace.

To be fair though, it’s kind of tiring to keep calling her ‘high-school girl’ even in my mind. I suppose it’s fine to ask her for her name.

“Okay, then what is it?”

Hearing that, the high-school girl nodded her head in satisfaction, and revealed her name.

“It’s Sayu.”

“Sayu.”

“In kanji, that would be the ‘Sa’ from ‘Bishamon’1 and the ‘Yu’ from ‘Yasashii’[2]”

“This is the first time I’ve heard someone use Bishamon to describe the kanji.”

Sayu revealed an innocent smile. Using a ladle, she scooped the miso soup from the pot and filled a bowl that she had taken from somewhere without asking.

“Hey, how long are you planning to keep this up?”

“Hmm—”

Hearing that, she pressed the bowl of miso soup in her hands in my direction.

“Well, just chow down for now. We can talk after that.”

“Why are you the one in control here?”

At about the same time as I answered, my stomach released a loud growl.

Now that I think about it, I threw up everything that I ate last night. I also slept past noon, so my stomach is completely empty.

Hearing the echoes from my stomach, Sayu’s lips curled knowingly.

“Aren’t you gonna eat?”

“… Alright.”

I reluctantly received the bowl from Sayu.

Expectedly, I couldn’t bring myself to say ‘I’ll eat, so get out of here.”

Notes:

[1] ‘Bishamonten’ 毘沙門天, also known as Vai?rava?a, is an important deity in Japanese Buddhism.

[2] Yasashii 優しい stands for kindness. Overall, the name is written as 沙優. Yoshida is 吉田.