I Won't Go Back to My Family Who Abandoned Me

***

While sitting against a tree and eating bread, Leticia glanced at the child. The boy looked down at the bread she’d given him, and took a bite. After he chewed a few times without expression, a surprised look came into his tidal colored eyes.

“Delicious!”

“Right? It’s my favorite bread.”

When she heard it was delicious, Leticia smiled and ate bread along with him. Because she was hungry, she ate all of her bread before she knew it, so she asked the child.

“Why are you here?”

“Because my younger siblings were bothering me.”

Leticia immediately understood that he’d run away from his younger siblings, and opened her eyes wide in surprise.

“You have younger siblings? I have some too.”

“Isn’t it hard listening to them?”

When he asked with a tone that begged for sympathy, Leticia burst into laughter.

“It’s hard, but they’re still cute. I guess all siblings are like that.”

It would be a lie if she said that it wasn’t hard. There were many times when she wanted to be lazy, and not hang out with them. However, when they looked at her with eyes that said they loved her, she couldn’t resist their cuteness. Her younger siblings were an existence that she couldn’t hate.

After having such a friendly conversation, she became a little closer to the boy.

The child reminded her more of herself then she thought. First of all, he has siblings similar in age to her own, and they both had mothers that were sick.

Maybe that’s why it was more comfortable and enjoyable to be with this child than the children from the village.

From that day on, they didn’t say anything, but they met at the field around the same time as if they’d promised each other.

“What’s that?”

As usual, Leticia met with the child that day. As soon as she saw him, she smiled and saw the picnic basket next to him.

“In return for the bread you gave me last time.”

What he took out while talking was toast covered with blueberry jam. Leticia smiled brightly, and immediately took a bite.

“It’s so delicious! How did you know I like blueberry jam?”

“You told me last time that you wanted to eat it, but couldn’t.”

“Oh, did I do that?”

Leticia looked down at her half-eaten toast with a vague expression at the obvious reply. She didn’t know that he’d remember what she’d said.

Somehow, she was feeling emotional and kept smiling.

“There’s more, so eat slowly.”

“Yes.” freℯ𝓌e𝚋𝐧𝘰vℯl.𝐜𝚘𝗺

Leticia nodded her head, and ate the remaining toast. The child was quietly watching her eat, then he handed over another piece of bread coated in fruit jam.

The more she ate, the more she felt something strange rising from deep inside, and now her eyes were starting to tear up.

“There’s something on your mouth. Wait… Why are you crying?”

The child, who’d been smiling about Leticia having jam all over her mouth, looked surprised and asked what was wrong.

She could feel his gaze, but Leticia didn’t take the bread out of her mouth.

“I’m not crying.”

“Liar. You’re crying.”

“I’m crying because it’s delicious.”

As Leticia tried to swallow the tears, the boy wiped away her tears with the back of his hand, and jokingly said to her.

“You’re such a baby.”

“I’m not a baby.”

“Crybaby.”

“I’m not a crybaby.”

Even as she stared at him as if she hated it, the child wiped the jam off of Leticia’s mouth carefully. With a friendly touch, Leticia paused without realizing it.

It was always her job to take care of others. She never said when she was sick or if she was injured. However, whenever her younger siblings were sick or hurt, she’d comfort them and stay by their sides.

Now that the position was reversed, her heart felt like it was filled with clouds.

Leticia received the milk handed over by the child, and said without realizing it.

“I’m jealous of your siblings.” ƒ𝘳ee𝔀e𝚋n૦𝐯el.c𝗼𝓂

“My siblings? Why?”

“Because they have a sweet brother like you.”

She couldn’t complain very much about how hard it was, how exhausting it was, or how she wanted to rely on them. Since she was the oldest child, she needed to take good care of and protect her younger siblings, so that her sick mother wouldn’t feel bad and her father, who was making money far away, wouldn’t worry. It had been a long time since she’d been so caught up in this compulsion, killed her true feelings and hid them away.

‘I wish I had an older brother like him.’

She was confident that she would do well then.

However, the child reacted poorly to Leticia’s words.

“Well, my siblings don’t like me.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. They always say they don’t like me.”

All they would say was that they hated their brother, or their brother hated them. When he first heard those words, he was confused, but now he was used to it so he didn’t pay much attention to it.

It wasn’t even particularly hurt by it, but Leticia looked like she felt sorry for him and soon clenched her fists resolutely.

“Then I’ll like you!”

“You?”

“Yes!”

She nodded strongly, speaking from the bottom of her heart, and this time she even squeezed his hand. The child couldn’t help but laugh at what she said through her swollen eyes.

“I don’t need a crybaby as a younger sister.”

“I’m not a crybaby!”

Since then, Leticia had rapidly grown close to the child. The two became comrades, and a safe haven for each other.

When they met, they’d talk about each other’s younger siblings, and sometimes they’d talk about their cuteness.

The child complained to Leticia about what was wrong with his younger siblings. However, as Leticia listened to him, she thought to herself.

‘You’re a good big brother.’

He always refused them because he said he was too lazy and didn’t want to listen, but she could tell that he really cared about his younger siblings.

Then one day, their unexpected separation arrived.

“I have to go to the capital because we have to find another clinic.”

When she asked why he looked depressed today, the child explained that he had to leave the countryside. He added that even with the countryside nursing, his mother’s physical condition wasn’t good, so it couldn’t be helped.

When the only person who recognized her heart and shared her feelings left, Leticia had trouble hiding her feelings for a while. When the emptiness in her heart left by the boy was too much to bear, she would sit alone in the field and pass the time.

Soon after, her father returned and her mother, who’d been laying in bed all the time, began to recover her energy and her gloomy heart slowly disappeared.

Thus, Leticia forgot about the child’s existence.

***

‘That was a strange dream…’

Leticia woke up with a blank look, and slowly blinked.

It was too vivid and memorable to be a dream, it felt like it had happened in the past.

“Are you awake now?”

Enoch sat by the bedside and gently stroked Leticia’s cheek. The moment she saw him while she was still half-asleep.

‘Huh?’

He seemed to overlap with the child she saw in her dream.

The impression was too similar for it to be called an illusion, so she suddenly came to her senses.

“Hey, Enoch.”

“Yes.”

“Do we know each other from somewhere else?”

“….”

“…?”

She waited for an answer, but Enoch just quietly looked down at Leticia. Soon after, a small smile spread across his face.

“Are you coming on to me, ma’am?”

“What? No, that’s not it…”

“Unfortunately, I’m already married, so you can’t flirt with me.”

Leticia gasped, speechless at the sight of his troubled face.

As soon as she made eye contact with Enoch, who wore a playful smile, she lightly hit him on the forearm.

“What are you talking about? You’re married to me!”

When she saw people playing around like this, she sometimes felt deceived by Enoch.

When she narrowed her eyes and glared at him, Enoch soothingly said to Leticia.

“I got a letter from Count Aster today.”

“What did it say?”

“There’s something important they want to talk about.”

“What? What does that mean?”

For a moment, she was worried that something bad had happened, but Enoch replied while brushing Leticia’s hair.

“They wanted to meet you to discuss it, so I said you’d go visit them right away.”

Seeing a smile spread across Enoch’s face, she thought it couldn’t be bad news.

Relieved inside, Leticia carefully asked.

“Did you hear something?”

“I don’t know either. Should I just say that it’s something that I’ve guessed?”

“What is it?”

Leticia urged him to tell her quickly, and pestered him for an answer. However, Enoch lightly shrugged and turned away. Leticia followed with a resentful look on her face.

“Why aren’t you telling me?”

“I thought it would be best to hear it directly from them.”

“Can’t you secretly tell me?”

She deliberately grabbed his sleeve and looked up, but Enoch refused to answer until the end. He just told her to wait until she hears it from the Count and Countess.

Inevitably, Leticia went to wash up and left with Enoch for the Aster mansion.

She couldn’t wait to hear what the news was.

***

Upon arriving at the Aster mansion, the Count and Countess welcomed Leticia and Enoch with a smile. She knew the news was good when she saw that their faces were already happy before they had even greeted Leticia.

They were guided to the drawing room, drank some tea for a while. They talked about the latest gossip, happy to be able to spend time like this together.

While she wondered what the news was, Leticia’s eyes opened wide at what the two said.

“Huh?”

As soon as she heard it, she breathed in and covered her mouth with both hands. She was so moved by the unexpected good news.

“We found out not too long ago.”

“Oh, my. Congratulations!”

Leticia couldn’t hide her joy because she knew how much Count Aster and his wife had wished for a child. Enoch, who was sitting next to her, also said his congratulations.

“Come to think of it, Leticia, you’ll be an older sister again.”

“I know. Is there anything you want to eat?”

Countess Aster gave a small laugh and shook her head, saying that Leticia seemed to always worry about others as soon as she spoke.

“Your father is doing everything for me. He’s even taking care of me.”

“Of course I’m taking care of you.”

In response to the scolding voice, Count Aster moved his shoulders more confidently, asking what he did wrong.

Leticia and Enoch, who were watching the scene, laughed aloud at the same time.

.

.

.

“Let.. Leti…?”

On the carriage ride back to the Achilles residence, Letisha dropped her gaze as she touched her hand together.

Leticia had always thought of herself as a person who knew herself well, and that she wasn’t very greedy.

While spending time with Enoch, she developed a desire to be with him. Originally, she only wished to be next to him, but as time passed her desire grew to wanting him to be the sole person beside him.

Once she allowed herself to be greedy, it grew endlessly, and sometimes she couldn’t handle it either.

Even in the midst of all this, another greed was created today.

‘A child born between me and Enoch.’

Perhaps when that child was born, she would have the desire to make them happier than anyone else.

A very fascinating yet sweet greed. Now she wanted to have that desire.

Leticia smiled gently, and held Enoch’s hand. It felt lovely being able to hold hands like this, so Enoch lightly kissed her forehead.

Leticia smiled gently, and enjoyed holding Enoch’s hand. As soon as she raised her head, Enoch’s gaze intertwined with hers and he smiled down at her.

His eyes looked at her as if she was lovely no matter what. She should have gotten used to it by now, but she still felt overwhelmed.

‘The child born between us would be as kind as he is now.’

Leticia slowly leaned on Enoch’s shoulder and hoped inwardly.

May the greatest blessing in the world come to her too.