Chapter 25 – After-sales Service

(ED: Hey guys, TL(SodaOrange) has been really busy with coursework, so I translated this chapter. This is my first chapter and I hope there’s not too many mistakes. Enjoy!)


Since I wasted a lot of time with Ai Mi, when I got back, the Old man was already home.


The door of his room was open again, and he was voice chatting with someone on his computer.


When he saw that I returned, he beckoned me over.


“Xiao Lin, come over here for a second!”


“What? I still didn’t eat yet!”


“Just come over here for a second! Just for a sec!”


The old man’s room used to be the study room, but now he uses this room for both sleeping and managing the online store.


The master bedroom always evoked painful memories for my father. So, it’s now being used as a storage, and half the room is filled with cardboard boxes.


But, the double bed is still left there as the old man is reluctant to throw it away. He often cleans it and adds mothballs, since he’s afraid it might be damaged by bugs.


One afternoon, I saw the old man cleaning the double bed by chance. Under the sunlight, his expression looked extremely lonely.


Due to his glasses reflecting the sunlight, I couldn’t clearly see the old man’s eyes. However, his lips that were slightly open, and the curves of his face, it was as if he was a tragic character from ancient Greek carved as a marble statue.


I’m afraid of the old man’s expression, and I’m also afraid of that double bed. I’ve never slept on it even once, and I always tell the old man to just throw it away.


He would always smile and say, “It could still be used, it’s pretty sturdy, we can make this the guest room.”


I don’t really think letting the guest sleep in a room half filled with adult goods can be considered respectful conduct.


Compared to the master bedroom, the old man’s study room is very messy. The bookcase, the desk, the computer, the wheeled sofa chair, the printer, and the printer paper that scattered the floor…it’s comparable to Afghanistan that was just bombed by America.


On each corner of the ceiling hung a strip of writing paper? It seemed like white strips you would hang when a member of the family passed away.


On each of the strips was a line of a self motivational poem written by the old man:


As deep as the ocean, as immovable as a mountain, as leisurely as a cloud,


as firm as bamboo, as arrogant as a hawk, as diligent as an ant,


as happy as a moth attracted to flames, to be forgotten as sand carried by the wind,


as calm as death, to give up with no regrets as former love.


(ED: Chinese poems sound nice, but it sure is a pain to translate well. It doesn’t necessarily translate to “as X as Y..”, but I kept it in this format to make it sound very poemish)


It should be similar to what Pu SongLing wrote to encourage himself, but this is just something the old man wrote in the spur of the moment.


Since his incentives are limited, if he gets worked up just a bit, then he will start to indulge in the sad memories of my mother. (or he’ll just lose himself in the world of H mangas)


I thought it was a bit cool. If I didn’t control myself I would have put it into practice. Although, it would have been much better if that one line didn’t compare to a hawk, but to a wolf.


As I looked as these 4 hanging sheets of paper, I remind myself once again: Definitely don’t fall into Ren Xiao Qin’s trap.


People always say ‘Time heals all wounds‘, but I don’t really feel that feel that way. The poisons that my mother left in the old man has barely healed at all.


It’s still safer to be a lone wolf.


On the old man’s computer screen, the head of someone named “XXX films guides the people” seemed to move. I don’t even need to give it a second thought, this guy is definitely Director Cao.


“What are you doing, ya old man! I already told you that I don’t want to be a kung fu actor anymore! Also, this guy is unreliable…. and I still haven’t got back at him for that shit he pulled earlier.”


“I was wrong, I shouldn’t have tricked you into making the delivery.”


The old man had no backbone, and he immediately plead forgiveness.


“But Director Cao needs to talk to you, it’s something serious.”


Something serious? Does a big loss like him even think about serious matters?


I connected to the chat, and Director Cao’s murderous voice was heard.


“Xiao Ye Zi! You brat! You almost killed me!”


“Huh?” I never thought the first thing he would do is insult me.


“Hey hey hey, just because I don’t want to act as Jin Ling Young Thug, do you have to insult me?”


“Who said I was talking about Jin Ling Young Thug?”


Director Cao seemed to get even angrier.


“Although, I do wish you can play the role of Jin Ling Young Thug, there is a much more significant matter at hand! A matter of life and death!”


I waited until he spoke.


“Just… the H manga that you delivered today, it was missing a page! I was just getting into it, then I realized it was missing a page!!!”


In an instant, my face formed this 囧 (expression).


“If it’s missing a page, then the manufacturer will take responsibility. Our online store is very trustworthy, so we will exchange it for a new copy.”


“But, I’m so heart-broken! That missing page was the climax, it was when the loli discipline committee member was at the peak of humiliation, I really wanted to see her expression!”


His intonation was extremely exaggerated, as if he was a spirit full of regrets that came back from hell.


A grown man, weeping to his son’s classmate about his misfortunes with H manga. Talk about humiliating….


The old man who was listening on the side could only smile bitterly.


Finally, I promised Director Cao that I would bring a new copy for him tomorrow. As for the old copy, his son Cao JingShen, will bring it to me.


Letting his own 14 year old son deal with the H manga that he bought, is this good for a teenager’s growth? Well, I’m not in any position to talk about them. After all, the H manga that they bought was sold to them by me and my dad.


Moreover, about the conduct of Cao Jingshen. I don’t think he can degenerate anymore?


Director Cao also told me: Don’t bring a sealed copy, make sure to tear off the wrapping, and double check the pages. If there’s another missing page, then he will fly to Hong Kong and burn down that publishing house.


The H manga that needed to be exchanged was the fifth book of the series ‘Ultimate Teacher XXX’, it was called ‘Instructor’s Colorful Lessons’. It appears to specialize in all kinds of classroom PLAY.


Just as a precaution, I tore off the plastic wrap and read through it once. The main character of this H manga took advantage of the weaknesses of his female classmates to coerce them into shameful lessons in the classroom. It was extremely indecent,I was blushing just by reading this.


There are no issues with this copy, so I stuffed it into my backpack. All I have to do now is exchange with fatty Cao JingShen tomorrow.


Since the old man already ate outside, I’m eating alone tonight.


The soy sauce beef was too salty, and the veggie balls were a bit hard.


I didn’t lay my hands on Ai Mi’s precious coke and chips, and I secretly hid it in a corner of my room.


I’ll try to invite Ai Mi here before they expire and let her feast.


An American idol who has released an album, but has never eaten chips. It’s too pitiful.


The next morning I left for a run without eating breakfast.


I didn’t bring a sandbag, I just took my backpack, as it had a similar weight.


I ran three laps around Dong Shan Lake. Maybe it’s because I haven’t trained for two days, I started to sweat a bit.


An old grandpa wearing a reddish purple kung fu shirt was shadow boxing by the lake. After he saw me, he slightly nodded at me.


I often see this martial arts grandpa, he always gets up earlier than me.


Since he didn’t see me training for the past two days, maybe he thought that I gave up halfway.


After I finished training, I took a route that I usually don’t use. It was a route that took longer to get to school.


If I took this route than there’s probably no way that Xiao Qin could ambush me, right?


As I thought, I didn’t see Xiao Qin in the first lesson.


While using my textbook as a cover, I was eating a red bean bun bought from the snack counter. I kind of felt pretty bad.


Xiao Qin is probably being punished, and made to stand alone in the fields bracing the cold.


After the lesson ended, Xiao Qin walked sullenly into the classroom carrying her backpack and sat into her seat.


“Why were you the only one that was late this time?”


Big loud mouth cheerfully came and asked. But, as she saw the expression on our faces, she seems to have felt there was an awkward atmosphere between us.


“Did they get into a quarrel?”


Big loud mouth embarrassingly walked back towards the middle of the classroom, and started gossiping away with her partner, little handy phone. (ED: A nickname that basically implies she’s a gossiper)


Xiao Qin had her head down and prepared the textbooks for the next lesson, she didn’t pay attention to me at all.


I suddenly felt a bit lonely.


“Grumble grumble grrr”


It sounded like someone’s stomach rumbling.


Xiao Qin’s face turned red.


“Are you hungry? You didn’t eat breakfast again?” I asked.


“Yeah… I didn’t eat. I wanted to wait for Ye Lin classmate to eat together. But, I waited for a long time and didn’t see you…..”


If you didn’t see me, then just come to school by yourself! Why do you have to be so stubborn and wait until you’re late!


“Even though I already guessed that Ye Lin classmate took a different route, I thought in my heart: what if…, what if you got into an accident?”


“Accident? What accidents can I get into?”


“Being bitten by a dog, getting hit by a car, or getting abducted by aliens…”


Heyheyhey, are you really worried about me? Are you not actually cursing me because I deceived you? Why would aliens even abduct me? Do I have more scientific research value because of my short legs? Even if I was bitten by a dog, or hit by a car, and you found a solution. What would you do against aliens? Don’t tell me you have the confidence to defeat aliens? Has your martial arts skill already reached the level where aliens are only small fries for you?


Maybe it will be a scenario like this? While she’s holding the alien by its antennas and smashing it against a telephone pole, she’ll also scream: “Damn Namekians, I only need two power ups to whoop your ass!”


Seems like my thoughts drifted a bit too far.


I took out half of a bread from inside my desk and handed it to Xiao Qin.


“How about you eat this first to fill up a bit? I bought two pieces this morning, there’s still half left.”


Xiao Qin gratefully accepted it.


She didn’t eat it, but carefully started to inspect it under the sunlight, as if she was trying to find a New World on top of the bread.


“What are you looking for?”


“I’m looking for the glistening saliva of Ye Lin classmate, so it will be an indirect kiss!”


“Return it! If you’re not going to eat it then give it back!”


I used my hands to split that bread, it doesn’t have any saliva on it!


As she saw me reaching my hands towards the bread, she hurriedly bit down and almost bit my hand.


“Nom nom nom~~”


Why are you making those kind of sounds! Don’t you always eat silently? Why do you have to make those strange sounds while eating my bread and staring at me?


Don’t tell me… she’s thinking of me as seasoning?


I was really exhausted by her. When it’s break time, I’ll go exchange the H manga with Cao JingShen.


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