Isekai Kaeri no Ossan wa, Fusei Sukiru de Fathercon Musume-tachi o Tororori ni

As I entered the studio with Producer Kurosawa, we immediately did our briefing session. Surrounded by cameras, I sat down on a folding chair and discussed together. I was full of experiences working part time only, so I have no idea how to conduct proper business meetings, but somehow, I could still feel the strange atmosphere around the room.

There’s the producer, Kurosawa, sitting with his legs outstretched, and the bigshots of the advertising firm, while countless women were standing around them. Looks like an idol activity or something but I have no clue why they are here. The women couldn’t be considered amateurs, but they couldn’t be considered pro idols either. These people used to be involved with us a lot, and they look restless. Honestly, I feel like there’s a feeling of this being something like a mixer. Is a television studio specializing in variety shows supposed to be this tense?

Well, so be it.

From the start, I didn’t have a deep interest in broadcasting industries. I knew how a famous, pretty girl from my hometown debuted as a pure, innocent actress, but she had more up her sleeve other than her looks. She was also a notorious bad girl. She’d change partners frequently and she used to be involved in school violence. The media forgone her awful personal history and transformed her into a hardcore ojou-sama.

Meanwhile, just before I was summoned to that other world, I had a relative that quit college to become an entertainer. It’s been 17 years since then, so I sometimes wondered if he’d turned up to be a presenter already. Unfortunately though, he’d fallen down to nothing. According to his mother, he starred in a variety program at one point, but he was gone from the spotlight without anyone noticing. He went back home neck-deep in debt one day and now he spent his days drinking and getting himself tattoos on his back. Then I thought, well, so be it.

The broadcasting industry is the type of world where the livelihood of someone can be changed according to the numbers. I’m okay with that and decided to live with this relationship where we both used each other.

That said, right now, I wonder what these apprentice idols are thinking as they tried to flatter the producer and I. They all had gotten into the show business, but they’re still doing stuff no different than just being a promotional model. If I’m going to be honest, it’s like they’re trying to entice us for career advancement. One of them even said “Nakamoto-san, you’ve got a nice body” as she hands me her business card.

“Lots of work start to pop up recently haven’t they? I used to love magic tricks, so I practice a lot at home, so I rea~lly want to be an assistant performer.” f𝐫ee𝘄ℯ𝚋no𝐯𝐞l.c𝘰m

“I’ll consider it.”

I took their suggestions out of courtesy and put them into my breast pocket. Of course, I plan to shred them and flush them down the toilet. I’m sure some of these girls would feel hurt by it, then they would feel that their dreams are crushed and turn to hate the society. I read in a book once that someone’s intent to kill is at its peak when the person you try to take advantage on is refusing you, and I feel like this is going as written. Love would turn into hatred when the person you love betrays you.

What would happen to a summoned hero if he couldn’t get used to his homeland, the modern society at the end of his journey? When he was left unaccepted by the Japan he saw in his nostalgic dreams, wouldn’t that produce an intense urge to kill?

I had the same experience when I came back, but soon afterwards, I redirected my rage at myself. I didn’t have the place to blame society when I have Elza’s blood on my hands.

“…then let us leave it at that. Nakamoto-san, shall we go?”

The meeting wraps up. As I slowly got back on my feet, I started walking in front of the camera.

This is what we discussed; I’ll cover a child actor with a piece of cloth and have the girl’s twin appear from the floor. When I lift the cloth, what’s this, a cloning magic! After that I just have to provoke the guy by throwing some shade and say something like “Anyone can do this! If it bothers you, come forward and prove it!” and drop the mic. At best, this is just a frivolous variety programming, an entertainment program. Of course, we expect viewers to see through our tricks, but if we can laugh it off and get some good views, that’s all we need.

“Alright, let’s start!”

Five seconds off, said the floor director before starting his countdown.

Five, four, three, two, one.

“Action!”

I turned to face the child actor. I’m sure she’s still about 10 years old. Her looks are about average, having a small, single-edged eyelid. Her age makes her look cute, but in due time she’ll grow up to be a plain girl. The girl had no outstanding points aside from the fact that she’s got a twin.

“Alrighty then, let’s show the newest magic trick of our magician Nakamoto!” I said in a cheerful tone and covered the girl with a piece of cloth and shook my arse towards the camera. Yeah, I’m mostly just clowning around.

“Recently there’s been a fuss of the cloning incident, right? I guess this oji-san should do it as well…right?”

The staff’s laughter echoed.

At the end of the day, I’m just playing the role of a foolish comedian. Someone no one would hate or look up to, and I have to keep myself in this position.

“Alrighty then, what do you think will happen after I cover this girl with this piece of cloth?”

What’s gonna happen!? Said the producers and staffs hooting about.

Seeing their smiles, it almost feels like this is a part of a club activity instead of a job, meanwhile the Assistant Director whom the director worked to the bone looked serious as always.

I covered the girl with a black cloth and the cue card told me to hold it for about 10 seconds. Pretty sure during this time the little sister would pop out from the floor.

“Alright, oji-san will start cloning the girl now! I’ll clone them right now! For real!” I tried making an image of a cheerful clown, and I think it’s fine as long as it’s interesting some people.

Then I lifted the cloth.

“Ooh what is this!? The girl is split into two!!”

I intentionally changed my tone as I jumped away.

“Daaamn, looks like I can actually do it too. It’s pretty simple actually.” The camera points at me. “…Now as you all see, with the power of my hips, this arse can break a metal bat and it could also save people. It’s hard living like this you know…like very hard.”

The twins looked up at me with eyes devoid of emotions.

“If someone has a power like oji-san…I’m sure they’re going to have it rough too. If they didn’t sacrifice something important, they wouldn’t be able to come to this domain. What did he lose that he’d want to start cutting people and split them into two? I’m not gonna say you can’t vent your anger. I too had to go through some salty quarrels lots of time, but you’ve gone too far. Keep doing it and karma will come around. Stop it already. I’ve been in the same place as you are, so I know.”

The staffs started to look worry, telling me that this isn’t what we discussed before.

“If you still wanna play around, I’ll erase you. An acquaintance of mine had fallen victim to your shenanigans, so you better stop.”

I might have gotten a bit too emotional. Maybe a big part of what I said will be cut away from the final take, but the producer Kurosawa was silently nodding.

“This is getting interesting” he said, smiling, but his eyes weren’t. “Nakamoto-san, do you actually know who the culprit is? That’s great, this could be a public showdown!”