Loser System and Berserker Me

【It’s finally fixed!】

System 12345 was moved to tears.

Its screen finally lit up, allowing it to share vision with Shu Yichao. It no longer had to blindly guess how the latter was faring based on the bits of information it picked up from its radar.

【I am amazing!】

System 12345 smirked in glee.

【Hostie, hostie~】

System 12345 decided to pull a big one now that it had regained its vision.

【I sense a huge number of nobles gathering together—it must be a banquet. Why aren’t you participating as well, my host? How can you miss out on such an important gathering? Even if they don’t invite you, you can always find a way to slip in!】

【This won’t do.】

【My host, do you still remember the information I provided you last time? I—huh?】

【Why is so many people gone?】

System 12345 was confused.

It was finally able to browse the current data now that its screen was working. It did a quick search and found that a portion of people was already dead.

【Did a plague happen or a war break out?】

【My host, let me give you more treatment and vitality serums. This era looks dangerous. You have to be careful lest others do you in.】

System 12345 sent the resources over.

【My host, I have indicated the remaining nobles on your minimap. You can slowly match them with the information I have previously provided you… My host?】

System 12345 quickly noticed that something was amiss.

Why is the screen not changing? It was also lagging when I searched up the information earlier.

It spent a moment in thought before checking the backend data—latency 9999.

【Ah?】

…

Many guests were gathered in a dim room with smooth marble floors, illuminated by the flickering flames of candles and oil lamps.

Dignified servants walked to and fro the passageways with huge plates, serving delicacies to the guests. Exotic dancers swayed their flexible hips to a joyous melody from an orchestra of drums, flutes, and harps.

The resplendently-dressed guests leisurely half-laid on soft couches as they chatted and enjoyed their meal.

The content of their conversation, however, was nowhere as leisurely as the atmosphere.

“Hmph! What have you been doing? You confidently told us days ago that you have the means to bring down the Khitan Caesar, but why is he still alive and kicking right now?”

“We tried, but nothing worked!” the questioned noble exclaimed in distress.

“I tried bribing a servant to poison him, but that servant was killed as soon as he entered the room, and many of my henchmen were implicated in that too.

“I thought of burying gunpowder on the road, but the servant I sent to dig the trap was killed before he could dig up two shovels of dirt, and the Khitan Caesar went ahead to kill yet another group of people along with him.

“We did manage to smear poison where he often strolls, but he was unaffected…

“On top of that, he goes on a massacre each time we make a move. He doesn’t have any evidence, but he still doesn’t hesitate to mess around and even gets the correct targets every time as if he has a third eye or something…”

Some of the nobles teared up from indignation.

“I have never seen anyone as barbaric as him!”

“Luckily,” one of the nobles drew a cross in front of his chest, “the Venetians have made a move. He’ll be leaving very soon.”

“I heard about that too.”

“Indeed. As soon as the Caesar leaves the city, we’ll chase off that swine of an emperor too and close the city gates!”

“That’s right!”

“Let’s start by slaughtering the farmer militias Constantin XI is raising!”

One of the nobles gritted his teeth in anger. “Mere offspring of lowly butchers and farmers think that they have become officials just because they spent a few days learning Khitan words? How dare they pull their weight in front of us?!”

“Drag out those filthy peasants who dare covet our fields and kill them too—no, we should sell them to the Venetians as slaves instead! Let them know that we aren’t to be trifled with!”

While the nobles were scheming how to restore Thessaloniki to its former glory, a commotion suddenly broke out outside.

“Which lowborn is causing a fuss outside?” a noble roared. “Don’t you know we’re discussing important matters?!”

Bam!

The door to the room was kicked open.

Under the flickering flames, a ravishing man with a gleaming scimitar appeared before the nobles, frightening these bluebloods out of their wits.

It was the Khitan Caesar, the demon who showed no hesitation in taking anyone’s life!

“Kill them all.” Shu Yichao brandished his scimitar.

“Caesar, what are you doing?!” the nobles screeched in horror.

The Elite Horse Archers charged forth with cruel sneers.

“No, you can’t do this. We are nobles! You have no right to punish us. You need evidence—AHHHHH!”

His words were cut short.

“Don’t kill me! I’ll give all my fortune to—”

His words were also cut short.

“Wuuuu! Spare me. I won’t dare to do it again!”

“I’m begging you! Please show mercy!”

Some cried. Some pleaded. Some tried to escape.

Tables were flipped. Paintings were torn. Warm blood trickled down the cold marble floor.

All the power they wielded. The noble lineages they descended from. Those meant nothing in this instant.

“Here.”

Holding the genealogy book in his hands, Shu Yichao hunted down the targets lit up on the minimap one by one. It didn’t matter whether they had hidden in a dark corner, slipped into a secret chamber, ran to the rooftop, or leaped out of the window onto the streets…

None of them could escape the fate of having their throat slit. It was as if Grim Reaper himself was on their backs.

Many civilians secretly watched the commotion. They were shocked to see the lofty nobles being slaughtered like livestocks.

“Open the doors! Open the doors!”

A plump noble was so tired that he couldn’t run anymore. As he gasped for air, he saw the Khitan cavalrymen slowly encircling him like cats teasing a mouse, so he had no choice but to desperately knock on a nearby tattered, wooden door.

“Fibo, open the door! You wretched lowborn, I know that you’re in there! Open the door right now, or else I’ll get someone to hang you tomorrow just like how I hung your son!”

Unfortunately, the peasant had poor situational awareness. She opened the door for the plump noble and was immediately taken advantage of.

In the end, the noble was still caught and dragged off. He screeched like a pig while leaving a trail behind him.

“Khan, the remaining ones have hidden in there.”

“The warehouse?” Shu Yichao eyed the place and chuckled. “Light it up! I trampled down the nobles back then, and it just doesn’t feel complete if I don’t burn them down too.”

It might be a huge stretch to say that Shu Yichao had killed all of the nobles in Thessaloniki, but he had at least purged 90% of them. Regardless, the city’s internal threat was resolved for now.

Hooray.

—

Starve’s Trivia:

“I trampled down the nobles back then, and it just doesn’t feel complete if I don’t burn them down too.”

It’s a play on a poem that talks about how even nobles, despite their high stature, are burned and trampled on in times of war. The poem serves to highlight the tragedy of war, and that no one is spared from it.

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