New Times, New Hell

Chapter 80 - Sagittarius Band

Yu Zhengdu froze in place because of the change in plot regarding him and Shang Que raising a child together. For a moment, he forgot to respond.

Shang Que started fantasizing again, “Don’t worry. When Peppa hatches, I’ll give her a human consciousness so that she can become the most intelligent female goose in the world.”

A daughter had already appeared……

Yu Zhengdu didn’t know if he had lost the ability to reason from shock. But surprisingly, he still managed to retort at this time, “Then does that mean she’ll be able to attend the high school exams?”

Shang Que very seriously answered, “After gaining a consciousness, there definitely won’t be any problems with her intelligence. However, it’d still be a bit difficult to attend the high school exams……”

No shit. Of course it would be difficult. A goose wouldn’t even be able to get a household registration booklet: a preschool wouldn’t let her in their doors, not to mention the high school exams.

Only to hear Shang Que continue, “Mainly because she wouldn’t be able to hold a pen with her webbed feet, meaning she wouldn’t be able to answer the problems.”

Yu Zhengdu expressionlessly said, “What a true pity. Otherwise, Peppa might become the first rocket scientist goose.”

Shang Que glanced at him. “If you really want to train her to become a rocket scientist, that isn’t completely impossible. I’ll come up with a plan for you……”

Yu Zhengdu hurriedly waved his hands.“No no no, I was just kidding.”

He didn’t want to see Shang Que forcing a goose to learn algebra at the company in the future. He would be able to accept this development, but they still needed to consider the mental health of their other employees.

Shang Que finally decided on a place to hatch the egg. That big white duck was very sensible. She knew that the spot was for her, so without even daring to quack, obediently walked over and squatted down. After Kang Jin returned with the newly bought nest, she would be able to start hatching the egg.

Everything was properly prepared. Shang Que sat back in his chair, satisfied. Upon noticing that Yu Zhengdu still hadn’t eaten his breakfast, he couldn’t help furrowing his brows. “Why aren’t you eating?”

Yu Zhengdu came back to his senses. “I have something to tell you.”

Shang Que: “Eat breakfast first. Otherwise, you’ll be hungry.”

Yu Zhengdu’s lips moved. “Okay, I’ll eat it right now.”

“Wait a minute. I think it’s gone cold.” Shang Que felt the box holding the breakfast. He stood up again. “I’ll heat it up for you in the microwave first.”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

Hadn’t Boss never been in a relationship before? So where did he learn how to be so considerate?

By now, he already couldn’t reject the other’s offer. Powerlessly, he leaned back. “Un.”

After heating up the breakfast and returning, Shang Que watched Yu Zhengdu finish eating before finally asking, “What did you want to tell me just now?”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

Ey, he had eaten the breakfast Boss had personally heated up. Additionally, he had watched Boss fantasize about raising a daughter all morning. He couldn’t really bring himself to tell Boss the truth at this time.

However, short pain was preferable to long pain. It wasn’t like he could wait until the child actually got older before making himself clear……ah pei. He had been brainwashed, all because of those strange things Shang Que had said. There was to be no waiting until the kid got older!

Yu Zhengdu made a conflicted expression in his heart. Yet, he still hesitantly started, “Regarding the relationship between you and me, I want to say……”

He finally opened his mouth with great difficulty, but froze up again.

Shang Que stared at him for a long time because he didn’t continue his sentence. He couldn’t help asking, “What do you want to say?”

Yu Zhengdu looked up at him. His gaze was a bit bewildered. Only now did he discover that he hadn’t come up with an eloquent statement yet.

Directly telling Boss I wasn’t planning on confessing to you? This wasn’t suitable or addressing the actual problem.

Say I don’t like you? But he instinctively was slightly unwilling to say this.

Momentarily, he couldn’t organize his thoughts. But the arrow was already notched onto the bow. He pondered a bit and decided to start with the culprit of this entire situation, the strange prophecy given by the app. He said, “I feel like our app’s big data fortune telling might not be accurate all the time……”

Shang Que unconsciously nodded. “Naturally. Human prophecies and big data prophecies both encounter the problem of probability.”

Yu Zhengdu hummed in implication. He furiously signalled to Shang Que through his gaze, “So&#k2026;&#k2026;”

Shang Que: “So what?”

Yu Zhengdu: “&#k2026;&#k2026;”

As expected, during such critical moments, he and Boss had zero synchronization when it came to communicating through eye contact.

He sighed softly to himself. Just as he was about to go all out, the sound of knocking drifted in from outside the door. Lu Lingxi pushed the door open and glanced at them before saying, “Boss, Xiao Yu, Qin Yuejian brought someone from his company here. He says they want to sign our company’s band.”

Qin Yuejian was an extremely popular male celebrity right now. He had many fans. Previously, Yu Zhengdu and Shang Que had gotten to know him because of the “Palpitating Youth” event. They had accidentally helped his deceased high school classmate, Zhan Keji, erase his obsession, freeing Zhen Keji from where he had been trapped in their high school classroom.

Currently, Qin Yuejian was already Luofeng’s VIP customer. Not only had he purchased the entire set of Luofeng’s products, he had also upgraded his Underworld communication service to the annual package. This way, he could maintain punctual communication with Zhan Keji.

However, Lu Lingxi’s words caused Yu Zhengdu to be extremely perplexed. He asked, “What band? Since when did our company have a band?”

Lu Lingxi was silent for a moment before saying, “The kinnaras.”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

Yu Zhengdu only found out the details of the situation after asking for them.

It turned out that this was all because he and Shang Que had previously exposed a cult master, the monk Jue Yin, in Diyang, where he had been scamming the elderly by pretending to be the head disciple of the “Great Kinnara King.” Consequently, they had subdued two Western music gods – kinnaras – who had escaped to the mortal realm prior to the end of the Heavens.

Because those faithful elders who had been scammed hoped that they could continue listening to the kinnaras’ Sanskrit, Yu Zhengdu agreed to send them an audio recording later.

But Luofeng didn’t have any professional audio recording equipment. Coincidentally, Qin Yuejian’s management company had started off as a record label. Thus, Yu Zhengdu rented their recording studio for two days through this connection. He made the kinnaras record a few songs and sent them to those elderly individuals.

Yu Zhengdu’s intention was to help those elders fulfill their wishes. Additionally, work at Luofeng was too busy, meaning that he didn’t pay attention to anything else after he sent the music.

Yet unexpectedly, those songs mysteriously went viral on the Internet.

In the beginning, the Sanskrit was only popular among the elderly. Many old people believed that only people of their age would like this type of music. They only shared these songs with each other, until later on, some of these elders’ children unintentionally heard them and became astounded. These children turned around and uploaded the songs online.

Kinnaras’ Sanskrit was extremely unique. It was a music style that had never appeared in the current music industry. It was clearly very Buddhist, but also strangely pleasing and touching, almost as if it could directly burrow into the depths of one’s heart.

It could be said that there hadn’t been a single person who hadn’t felt touched after hearing the kinnaras’ Sanskrit.

The Sanskrit had gone completely viral online. Even under the circumstances where nobody knew who the performers were, the songs had already gained a large population of fans.

“Right now, all the famous short video editors’ go-to background songs are the kinnaras’ songs,” Lu Lingxi said with a grimace. “Apparently, when a few gaming streamers used the kinnaras’ music as the background music during their livestreams, they became extremely polite while gaming. This surprised their fans a lot.”

Yu Zhengdu was very surprised too. “It has such an effect? Polite in what way?”

Lu Lingxi: “Apparently, when they cuss, they use ‘your mom’ instead of ‘your mom’……”

Yu Zhengdu: “……That’s considered polite?”

Shang Que was obviously more qualified to comment on the environment in games. Upon hearing this, he nodded. “In games, yes.”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

The surprising popularity of the kinnaras’ music aroused the attention of many management companies. Only, the other companies were still in the middle of investigating this mysterious band’s background while Qin Yuejian’s company was one step ahead of everyone else because they had previously rented the recording studio to Yu Zhengdu.

Yu Zhengdu thought about it. He looked towards Shang Que. “Should we go have a discussion?”

Shang Que waved his hand. “It’s not that important. You can go by yourself.”

Yu Zhengdu wasn’t surprised. For some unknown reason, Shang Que had always seemed to dislike these two little music gods. Thus, he nodded. “Okay.”

Just as he was about to stand up, Shang Que suddenly said, “I don’t think you’ve finished saying what you wanted to tell me?”

Yu Zhengdu paused for a second. He obviously couldn’t clearly speak his mind in only a few sentences. Qin Yuejian was still waiting. He pondered a bit and said, “Wait a moment. I’ll tell you after I get back.”

Shang Que felt that this wasn’t a big deal. “Okay.”

After, he suddenly revealed a mysterious smile, then turned on his computer screen. “Then let me first find some dresses for Peppa that are suitable for geese to wear……”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

Seems like Boss had truly already prepared himself to be a father.

Yu Zhengdu didn’t directly head to see Qin Yuejian and the person from his company. Instead, he sought out the kinnaras first and explained the current situation to them.

After all, according to how quickly the kinnaras were gaining popularity, even if they failed to reach an agreement with Qin Yuejian’s company, there would definitely be other management companies seeking them out. In other words, whether or not they wanted to sign a contract and debut was currently reliant on their attitudes, not the company’s attitude.

After hearing what Yu Zhengdu said, the two kinnaras were also extremely surprised.

It had been almost a hundred years since they had arrived in the mortal realm from the Heavens. However, they had spent all this time in hiding. Later, they also started their scamming journey with Jue Yin. They hadn’t learned any survival skills whatsoever.

Ever since they had been taken in by Shang Que and arrived at Luofeng, they hadn’t had anything to do other than record those few songs. Though Yu Zhengdu had never made things difficult for them because of this, they themselves always felt very embarrassed about it. Previously, they had even taken the initiative to attend Luofeng’s technical skills training for employees. They learned how to use Excel and Powerpoint in addition to other modern work skills. Recently, they had just finished the training lessons and had successfully become honorable customer service representatives. Additionally, because of their clear and wonderful voices, they had received great reviews from all of their clients, becoming Luofeng’s weekly “Customer Service Stars.”

Neither of the two kinnaras had thought that their opportunity for a career change would come so soon.

Yu Zhengdu smiled and said, “You guys are currently incredibly popular online. You even have fans who are voting for you on music rankings all of their own accord. They’ve already reached first on the wild ranking.”

The two kinnaras exchanged eye contact. Though they rarely communicated with mortals, they had lived in the mortal realm for many years, after all. They more or less understand some mortal things.

For example, they understood the concepts of the entertainment industry, fans, and music ranking votings that Yu Zhengdu had just mentioned. Only, they had never thought that they could possess these things. They also didn’t know what it meant to have all these things.

The female kinnara looked like she had reached an epiphany. “Speaking of, the faith we’ve received recently has suddenly increased a lot. Could this be the reason?”

Yu Zhengdu remembered the faith Shang Que had received due to his face and fell silent for a moment. He nodded and said, “If their love and support for you can be considered a type of faith, I assume so.”

“Jue Yin that old bald donkey!” The male kinnara started cussing out of the blue, “He lied to us for so many years! Tricked us into suffering for so long!”

The female kinnara very quickly realized this too. She cussed along, “That bald thief told us that we needed to start a cult in order to gather faith, that we needed to scam those old people! But he never told us that becoming popular could gain us faith too!”

The male kinnara, outraged: “Additionally, the faith we’re receiving is very obviously much more than before!”

The more they spoke, the angrier they got. They used all the swear words they had learned in the mortal realm, completely disregarding the dignified aura that Western gods ought to have. They only wished that they could personally visit the prison and beat Jue Yin up.

Yu Zhengdu broke out into a sweat from off to the side. No wonder people in the past said that doctors couldn’t heal themselves: it seemed that although the kinnaras’ music could help all sentient beings, it obviously couldn’t calm down the kinnaras themselves.

He waited until the two kinnaras had mostly finished cussing before waving his hands to signal for them to stop. He asked, “So, what are your thoughts right now?”

Actually, Yu Zhengdu had considered their work problem previously too. The kinnaras had a natural talent for music. Only staying as customer service in Luofeng was honestly a bit of a waste. However, Luofeng wasn’t really familiar with the music industry. Additionally, the kinnaras’ music was also extremely unique. If things didn’t get taken care of properly, it was very possible that they might get taken advantage of again, just like with Jue Yin. Because of the fact that the kinnaras had committed crimes before and were still serving time, he had always had a rather reserved outlook on this question.

However, a change had occurred. The kinnaras had gone viral online and a professional entertainment company was now handing them an olive branch. If they themselves desired to enter the entertainment industry, it was entirely possible for them to receive a better plan.

The two kinnaras exchanged eye contact. They read the meaning in each other’s eyes. The male kinnara nodded and told Yu Zhengdu, “If you and CEO Shang hadn’t saved us from Jue Yin, we couldn’t possibly get so much faith. So……we’ll listen to the company’s arrangements.”

“Okay.” Yu Zhengdu looked at them. With a smile, he said, “Then I suggest you guys debut.”

He was doing this not because he hoped the kinnaras could earn a lot of money for their company, but because he now knew how important faith from mortals was to gods and ghosts. If allowing them to debut could give the kinnaras the faith they wanted, he naturally wouldn’t stop them.

The kinnaras revealed tentatively joyful expressions. However, they were still a bit worried. “Will the Great Ghost King agree?”

Speaking of Shang Que, Yu Zhengdu’s mood became uncontrollably conflicted again. He couldn’t help but think that Shang Que had always been very supportive of him……

He sighed softly to himself and said, “I’ll let him know. He won’t be against it.”

The kinnaras finally relaxed upon hearing this. “Thank you so much.”

However, the kinnaras weren’t mortals, after all. It would be best if their activity was under Luofeng’s careful management now that the Heavens and Hell had collapsed. As such, they reached an agreement after brief discussion that the kinnaras’ labor contracts would still be signed to Luofeng. Their debut would be a collaborative effort and outsourced to a reliable management company. Luofeng and the management company would receive equal portions of dividends and the remaining amount would belong to the kinnaras. If they truly did become popular and start becoming busy, Luofeng could also assign them a specialized assistant.

The kinnaras hadn’t expected that they, two gods serving time for a crime, would get such an opportunity. They instantly felt incredibly grateful.

After confirming the kinnaras’ intentions, it was now time to resolve the kinnaras’ appearances.

The female kinnara was fine. She looked elegant and beautiful. Disregarding the fact that she knew how to play the harp and sing, even if she didn’t know how to do anything, she was still more than qualified to debut as a popular vase.

But the male kinnara was a bit more worrisome. The classic characteristic of their tribe’s males was the fact that they all had horse heads and human bodies. Forget debuting, it was even difficult to walk out the door while looking like this.

The male kinnara knew that his physical appearance was a bit strange too. With tears in his eyes, he sobbed, “It must be impossible for someone like me to debut, right?”

Yu Zhengdu stared at him, deep in thought. “Not necessarily.”

Qin Yuejian’s company was called Star Path. It had started as a record label and was quite professional, but not very large. They didn’t have a lot of great resources. Originally, they had managed to produce an extremely popular singer, but right after the singer had gotten popular, he had jumped ship to a big company. Fortunately, Qin Yuejian came along later on, allowing them to continue surviving.

Yet, Qin Yuejian was mainly an actor. Because of this, Star Path had constantly hoped that they would be able to produce another celebrity musician. Only, the Chinese music industry was at an all time low these days. Though Star Path had a certain accumulation in regards to music, their newly debuted singers hadn’t really been too successful.

Previously, Qin Yuejian had told his company that his friend wanted to rent the company recording studios for a few days. Originally, the company had been rather unwilling, but because Qin Yuejian was the most popular male celebrity in their company, they had still rented it out to show respect for him. However, they hadn’t paid much attention to the general situation.

Until the kinnaras’ music had gone viral online. Star Path hadn’t even realized that those songs had been recorded in their recording studios. They only found out after Qin Yuejian offhandedly mentioned it during a meeting when this mysterious band had been brought up.

Star Path felt incredibly regretful. Who would’ve thought that Qin Yuejian’s friend actually knew such extraordinary talents? And this was under the circumstances where they weren’t professionals. They could already predict what kind of impact this mysterious band would have on the music industry given training and packaging provided by a professional team.

Fortunately, it wasn’t too late. With Qin Yuejian as the middleman, they managed to find Luofeng one step ahead of all the other management companies.

This time, the person who had tagged along with Qin Yuejian was the music producer of Star Path.

Yu Zhengdu and Xu Hui chatted for a bit. After confirming that the other party was very reliable in both collaborative intent and professionalism, considering the fact that Luofeng’s situation was special, Yu Zhengdu decided that this company was obviously more suitable than any other company. Also, Qin Yuejian would be able to take care of the kinnaras if they signed to Star Path.

Yu Zhengdu thought about it and decided to put Star Path at the top of his list. Of course, the further details of their collaboration would need to be taken care of by professionals.

But currently, it was still necessary to have the kinnaras meet the representative from Star Path.

“Let me introduce everyone. These two are our company’s employees and also the mysterious band members that you’ve been looking for, Jin Na and Jin Luo.” While speaking, Yu Zhengdu opened the door to the conference room, ushering the two kinnaras inside.

To show their respect, Qin Yuejian and Xu Hui stood up. They looked in the direction of the door.

The next moment, the two of them both revealed shocked expressions.

A pause later, Xu Hui finally stuttered out, “Nice to meet you b-both.”

Qin Yuejian was slightly speechless too. “Miss Jin Na is very beautiful. Mr. Jin Luo……is very interesting.”

Only to see a man and a woman walk in. The woman was elegant and poised. The man stood up tall and straight. However, the man’s head……was covered in a rubber horse mask.

Yu Zhengdu calmly stated, “Mr. Jin Luo is a bit shy. He has slight social anxiety, so doesn’t like showing his face normally. I hope you’ll be able to forgive him.”

Qin Yuejian asked with wide eyes, “But that doesn’t mean he needs to wear a horse mask?”

Yu Zhengdu softly went oh. He added, “He normally likes to watch ‘BoJack Horseman.’”

Qin Yuejian, Xu Hui: “……”

Xu Hui was momentarily silent. He said, “But if Mr. Jin Luo is planning on debuting, it might not be super appropriate for him to keep wearing a horse head?”

“Why not?” Yu Zhengdu asked. “I’ve already come up with a name for their band. They can be named Sagittarius.”

Everyone: “……”

Sagittarius our asses. Sagittarius clearly had a human head with the body of a horse, okay!

The author has something to say:

Peppa: I, rocket scientist goose (hands on hips)