Seizing Dreams

Ch23 – The Past

Translated by: DMlations/Zryuu

Edited by: Amelea and FistFullOfDollars

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“That……song of yours, who did you sing it for?” Chen Yekai suddenly asked.

Yu Hao, “……”

Yu Hao remained silent and didn’t answer. He brought Chen Yekai to his dormitory building and up the stairs. Chen Yekai smiled as he said, “Who is the friend?”

“General.” Yu Hao answered.

“Who……is General?” Chen Yekai asked.

“Someone in my heart.” Yu Hao smiled, “It’s not you, Chen Laoshi. But……you can treat it as a song I sang for you ba, I sang the song for all of my friends.”

He sang that song for Zhou Sheng, Fu Liqun, Chen Yekai, Huang Ting, and even that journalist that he hadn’t met before whose name he didn’t even know. He sang it for everyone who had ever helped him……but the only one under the sunlight, was still General.

Chen Yekai’s body became heavier. Yu Hao couldn’t be bothered to think anymore. He took him by the arm and helped him walk upstairs. He rummaged around in Chen Yekai’s trouser pockets — there was no key inside. Chen Yekai was propped against the door on one shoulder. Yu Hao remembered that this door had a fingerprint lock, so he pulled Chen Yekai’s hand up to press down on it. The door opened.

It was warm in Chen Yekai’s house. Yu Hao placed him on the sofa. Chen Yekai laid down on his side and muttered to himself, “I hear you, I hear you——！

Yu Hao said, “Drink some water ba.” Then he turned around and walked to the kitchen to get some water, while Chen Yekai continued lying on the sofa as he gasped for breath.

He turned on the water purifier. For some reason, starting from the moment he met the General, memories from Yu Hao’s past were gradually becoming more lucid. Previously forgotten memories — like obscure negatives that were soaking in the solution used to develop photograph films — slowly came into focus as they floated up to the surface of the water.

The day Chen Yekai arrived at Ying city was exactly when that incident had happened. But they didn’t know each other before that. Can someone dream of a person that he has never met?

If we assume that he can, then under the premise that General has the ability to enter anyone’s dreamscape without having met them, he should be able to come and go freely in these dreams. So why did he say to Shi Ni, “You’re the one who summoned me here”?

If we assume that he can’t, then both he and Shi Ni should have met General before, and both of them must have hoped for someone who could save them. General would have then used this impression in their minds to occupy a place for himself in their dreams.

Chen Yekai has seen Shi Ni before. If he was General, then why would he turn into Sun Wukong in Shi Ni’s dreamscape? Also, before that incident occurred, he had never seen Chen Yekai before and never knew of his existence. So it couldn’t be Chen Yekai, could it be Zhou Sheng?! When he thought of this, Yu Hao’s heart suddenly began to beat wildly.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

The hearing is tomorrow, so he will see Shi Ni then. He has to confirm one thing with Shi Ni first. He just needs a little time with Shi Ni so she can answer that one question.

In the living room, Chen Yekai vomited.

Yu Hao quickly took a cup and went over. Chen Yekai had vomited all over the floor. Yu Hao supported him up and helped him drink the water, making sure he didn’t choke. Chen Yekai sighed, and Yu Hao realised that there were traces of tears on his face. He had actually cried!

“Laoshi?” Yu Hao was instantly at a loss. Chen Yekai’s drunkenness had already gone far beyond his ability to manage it. Chen Yekai laid back down and began to hum softly, and the song he hummed was actually the one that Yu Hao sang tonight! Yu Hao felt so embarrassed; why did he have to choose the kind of song that only teenage girls would like?!

“Obbxr ilxf sbe’gf atf tjqqlcfrr atja P kjcafv ab tbiv bcab atf wbra, ibbxr ilxf kf kfgf jmaejiis, rb mibrf ab ibnf. Ktja qfgrbc ktb obeuta jujlcra atf kbgiv obg wf……”

“Snfgs rmfcf kjr oliifv klat……P kjr rb obgaecjaf, ab tjnf wfa sbe……”

Vagjcufis fcbeut, Te Ljb mbeivc’a tfiq yea rwlif jcv rlcu abufatfg klat Jtfc Tfxjl. Lf byrfgnfv Jtfc Tfxjl obg jktlif, yfobgf tf vfafgwlcfv atja tf kjr pera vgecx jcv vlvc’a cffv ab ufa tlr rabwjmt qewqfv. Ktfc tf kfca ab atf yjatgbbw ab olcv rbwf mifjclcu reqqilfr ab alvs eq atf wfrr.

I should take a photo……Yu Hao laughed to himself as he mopped the floor. Chen Yekai, who was as perfect and flawless as a superstar, could have such miserable moments too.

“Do you still want to puke?” Yu Hao asked Chen Yekai, “I’ll prepare a basin for you.”

“I’ll hang your clothes back up.”

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As he spoke, he washed his hands and placed the clothes that Chen Yekai had lent him back in the wardrobe. After he hung up the white shirt, he thought of the navy blue one so he opened up the other door of the wardrobe. He suddenly saw a photo slip out of the navy blue shirt — that Chen Yekai had casually stuffed inside his wardrobe last time — and fall to the ground.

Yu Hao bent down to pick up the photo. He only took one look at it before he quickly turned, his eyes darting towards the living room.

In that moment, he had inadvertently uncovered a certain truth, and now somewhat understood why Chen Yekai reacted the way he did.

The Chen Yekai in the photo looked even more youthful than he did now; it seemed like it was taken about five to six years ago. He was wearing that navy blue shirt as he held the hand of another guy, their fingers intertwined. The guy had very handsome and delicate features and he was Chinese. The two of them stood in front of a waterfall and their smiles seemed so brilliant and carefree in that moment.

Read more BL at chrysanthemumgarden.com

The guy was wearing what Chen Yekai had kept to one side of this wardrobe — the white shirt that Yu Hao wore today! Also, that guy’s appearance may look very different from Yu Hao’s, but he did look slightly melancholy — just like how Yu Hao sees himself in a mirror. When he smiled, he still looked a little sad.

Yu Hao could even recognise the waterfall in their background — it came from the film《Happy Together》that he had watched several times, the place that Liang Chaowei and Zhang Guorong never managed to visit even once in their life……

The Iguazu Falls.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

A mix of feelings stirred within Yu Hao’s heart. Was that Chen Yekai’s ex-boyfriend? He’s gay? Have they broken up? Yu Hao didn’t dare to touch it anymore. He quickly placed the photo back into the navy blue shirt, and tried his best to pretend that nothing had happened. He felt extremely guilty, like he had really let Chen Yekai down.

“I didn’t do it on purpose.” Yu Hao said, “Chen Laoshi, I’m sorry, I really didn’t do it on purpose.”

He was not yet aware of the sensitive implications that he had inadvertently touched upon, and only acted like a child who was worrying about what he had done wrong. He decisively closed the wardrobe, and after some consideration, decided that perhaps the best course of action was to hide this secret in his heart forever, and to never let Chen Yekai know.

So, he had to take the shirt off again, fold it, put it back in its plastic bag and place it on one side of the sofa.

Chen Yekai was lying down flat on the sofa. Yu Hao turned Chen Yekai over onto his side, so that his vomit wouldn’t clog his airway and cause him to suffocate. He said, “Laoshi, I’ll go back first.”

Chen Yekai broke free from Yu Hao’s hand as he didn’t want to lie on his side, but rather on his back.

Yu Hao found a blanket and covered him with it. Chen Yekai’s eyebrows furrowed slightly.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Yu Hao tried to make him turn to his side several times, yet Chen Yekai remained stubborn. Yu Hao pondered for a moment and ended up sitting on another sofa that could only fit one person. He took off his clothes, covered himself with them and decided that he needed to take care of him for at least tonight, in case something happened.

He really had too many thoughts, and they were all extremely complicated and in disarray, tiring him out. For Yu Hao, perhaps the most shocking revelation today was that after seeing the photo, Chen Yekai seemed like a gong.

Had he also suffered because of love? Yu Hao thought of the two shirts that were hung together, and another movie’s plot surfaced in his mind:

Ang Lee’s《Brokeback Mountain》.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Why didn’t I think of it when I borrowed the shirt? Yu Hao really wanted to give himself a good slap. He turned the lights off and wearily closed his eyes in the darkness. As of this moment, he didn’t feel very excited or curious, he only thought that tonight, when Chen Yekai got drunk, he had recklessly charged into his heart.

He knew that Chen Yekai must have gone through a very sad period in his life, but he didn’t dare to say anything to him. He could only close the door to his heart, carefully, and take advantage of his ignorance to slowly walk away, so that everything remained tranquil and at peace. He wouldn’t be so presumptuous as to disturb the owner of that space again.

Sorry sorry sorry……Yu Hao uttered to himself countless times, I really didn’t do it on purpose……in the darkness, General’s voice rang out in his mind for some reason, “Good night.”

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Then he slept.

When he opened his eyes again, the sunlight was streaming in through the french windows. Yu Hao had curled up on a sofa for the entire night, so he felt like his body was falling apart. He found a blanket covering him, and the blanket smelled like the sun. The bag of clothes had also been taken away. The sound of running water could be heard from the bathroom, where Chen Yekai was taking a bath.

Yu Hao yawned, then got up and called out. Chen Yekai responded from the bathroom.

“I’ve prepared a toothbrush and towels on the wash basin for you, they’re all brand new.” Chen Yekai said, “You have to go to court today, right?”

Yu Hao suddenly remembered that he had arranged to meet up with Zhou Sheng today before heading to court. He hurriedly brushed his teeth and washed his face. Soon after, the sound of running water stopped. Chen Yekai came out wearing a bathrobe, then dried his hair behind Yu Hao. He asked, “Do you need me to accompany you?”

Yu Hao quickly waved his hand to motion that it wasn’t necessary.

Chen Yekai said, “Go after you take a bath? I’ll find some new underclothes for you.”

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Yu Hao waved his hand again. Chen Yekai said, “Then just wash your hair ba.”

Yu Hao’s hair was very messy, so that was okay. Chen Yekai blew his hair dry. Yu Hao heard the sound of a rice cooker coming from the kitchen —— Chen Yekai was cooking breakfast.

This kind of life seemed a bit unimaginable to Yu Hao. Perhaps, this was the kind of life he longed for? As he allowed the hot water run through his ears and hair, he recalled the guy who had a slight melancholic quality in the photo. Have they broken up? They should have broken up, but Chen Yekai was such a good person, so why would they break up?

Yu Hao blew his hair dry. Chen Yekai had already changed into a checkered set of pajamas. Two hot bowls of white rice were placed on the table, as well as a bowl of lotus root soup and some pickled cabbage.

“Have you gone through the details of the trial?” Chen Yekai asked.

Yu Hao picked up a pair of chopsticks, “We can’t collude with the witness beforehand. Huang Ting said that I should just answer whatever they ask me during the court session.”

Chen Yekai nodded, then said again, “This lotus root soup was cooked by an Aunt last night. Make do with it ba, and be mindful of the time.”

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Yu Hao looked at his watch, he still had a lot of time. He felt a bit anxious. He looked up at Chen Yekai, but Chen Yekai began laughing.

“What is it?”

“The food you cooked is delicious.”

“I just cooked a pot of white rice!” Chen Yekai smiled, “My ex always complained that my cooking didn’t taste good, and said that I didn’t seem at all like a Chinese student who was studying abroad.”

When Yu Hao heard the word ‘ex’, it confirmed his speculation, but he didn’t dare to ask any questions. He just smiled at Chen Yekai and drank his coffee, which made him feel much more energetic. The Aunt came over to clean up and said, “Your student?”

“Un, a younger brother.” Chen Yekai casually replied, then said to Yu Hao, “I’ll hail a cab for you. Ask Zhou Sheng to come down and wait.”

Yu Hao wanted to say “no need”, but he knew that Chen Yekai wanted to thank him for taking care of him last night, so he nodded and accepted his goodwill. When he reached the college gates, Zhou Sheng was waiting for him.

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Zhou Sheng, “You weren’t in your dorm this early in the morning?”

Yu Hao didn’t want to tell Zhou Sheng that he had spent the night at Chen Yekai’s residence, so he nodded.

“You washed your hair?” Zhou Sheng continued.

Yu Hao thought, why are you observing me so carefully today?

Zhou Sheng, “Changed your shampoo?”

Yu Hao, “……”

The cab arrived. Yu Hao studied Zhou Sheng with a doubtful gaze. Zhou Sheng looked puzzled as he asked, “Did you make my bracelet for me yet?”

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

“How could it be done that fast?” Yu Hao answered.

Zhou Sheng said, “Why are you acting a little strange today?”

Since the night before, Yu Hao had been preoccupied with questions relating to General, but his train of thought had been derailed by Chen Yekai’s secret. Now that he saw Zhou Sheng, he couldn’t help but think about it again. Aside from Shi Ni, he also wanted to question Zhou Sheng, but now didn’t seem to be the right time for it.

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