The Record Of Barton's Fantastical Events

Translator: Doggotranslation

In the warehouse inside the L-shape of Grande Funeral Home, the second floor was Benjamin’s bedroom. There was no wall, no door, and anyone could see it when they stood on the stairs, there was only a large bed, and a few wicker chairs, plus some wooden cabinets, so maybe a place like this shouldn’t be called a bedroom. But this was the only place in the Grande Funeral Home that gave people a feeling of ordinary.

Because after the werewolf dug out huge windows on all four sides, and covered the ground with dry straws, the originally barn-like wooden structure now became completely opposite to the dark and cold in the Grande Funeral Home. Of course, the most important thing was that Benjamin had a lot of photos that were kept inside wooden frames, placed on the table, or hung on the wall. Different tall and strong men and women in small vests with healthy muscular lines, posing with Benjamin in the photos.

Just like the home of an ordinary retired soldier, it was warm and secure.

At this time, two women were sitting on Benjamin’s bed.

“I’m really jealous of you.” Louise held a brush in her hand, dipped the power in her makeup box, and brushed it on Alice’s cheek: “You have the most perfect cheekbones! No need for unnecessary shadows at all!”

“Really?” Alice held a small mirror and looked at herself in the mirror. She couldn’t tell whether she had become beautiful or ugly. After all, the sixteen-year-old banshee had never established a correct aesthetic standard.

“I don’t need to lie to you.” Louise adjusted the position of the banshee’s face and nodded with satisfaction: “Done. You can ask Benjamin now.”

Alice jumped off the bed, rushed to the side of the guardrail, leaned forward, and shouted to the werewolf, who was “scratching” a square stone below: “Benjamin! Louise made me up!”

“It’s a little early for yo-” Benjamin said as he raised his head, on the top of a fluffy finger, a sharp conical nail was resting on the stone. On the white marble edge, the complex pattern has already begun to take shape.

“-u.” Benjamin gasped. To be honest, before today, he never thought Alice was beautiful. The nail accidentally pierced through the corners of the marble, several cracks quickly spread from the upper right corner of the stone: “very beautiful. Alice, you look very beautiful now.”

“Really?” Alice was a little bit shy after the surprise, and she ran to the stairs by holding the guardrail: “I’ll show it to Zach!”

Benjamin pushed the broken stone away, took another stone, and said with a smile, “He is still in the office.”

“Oh.” Alice’s hurried steps stopped, silently turned around, and walked back.

“Let’s go to see Old Hank!” Louise held the hands of Alice, who was slightly disappointed, went down the stairs, and walked toward the back of the warehouse.

Behind the warehouse, there were stacked round logs and already cut wooden timber. Old Hank was holding a knife and carving something on a coffin.

Jim was also here, but Old Hank thought Jim was too clumsy, so he asked him to stay away from the workbench, and gave him a wooden planer and asked him to remove the rough and excess surface of a board on the side.

“Alice?” Jim discovered the girl next to Louise. Her stiff and sunken face became soft and round, but her formal nervous appearance remained.

“Huh! Pretty woman!” Old Hank snorted. “No matter how pretty your face is, you still have to work! Alice, come here and help me!”

Hank was a strange old man. Apart from having a bad temper and always driving away guests, he has also never been kind to beautiful women.

So Alice felt relieved. She took Louise’s hand and whispered thank you, ran to Hank briskly, took the woodworking knife from Hank, started to carve it.

It’s time to tell the truth. The most important person in Grande Funeral Home was not the vampire Zach, nor the werewolf Benjamin, but the banshee Alice. She was in charge of the kitchen, cleaning, being an apprentice of Hank, and she was also responsible for grooming the bodies of the deceased... Now everyone knows how she developed her aesthetic standard...

Jim put down the planer and greeted Louise, “Louise, can we talk?”

“Okay.” Louise had nothing to do, so she followed Jim to the distance.

“Louise.” Jim looked around, confirming that no one was paying attention, lowering his voice, and asked, “after all this is over, what’s your plan?”

“Me?” Louise shook her head: “I don’t know, I haven’t thought about it yet.”

Jim was a little surprised. This clever woman didn’t even have a trace of vigilance. He continued to ask: “Are you not afraid? I mean, you and me, we are human. And they, they are...” Jim tried to use less offensive words, but after thinking for a while, he got nothing but ‘Monsters’, “Anyway, you don’t want to live here forever, do you?”

Louise thought for a while, “Hank, Hank is also just an ordinary old man.”

“Er.” Jim frowned. Hank clearly chose to ignore the werewolf’s fluffy fingers and the vampire’s “glass” deliberately. The only explanation was that Zach had used his red eyes to distort his will, “red eyes, Louise, You know that Zach’s red eyes distorted your will, right?”

“I know.” there were finally some expressions appearing on Louise’s face, and she sighed: “But even if he didn’t do this, I would still stay here. At least I don’t want to be eaten by nonhumans, and he can protect me.” Louise looked at Jim suspiciously:” Why do you ask me these? As far as I know, haven’t you also been attacked by a nonhuman? We are no different, we are all here to seek protection.”

Jim noticed a touch of wariness in Louise’s tone, it was Jim’s own fault. As Louise said, he was also weak in front of nonhumans, and cooperating with the vampire was just a different way to seek protection. In this situation, he was in no position to criticize Louise’s trust in the vampire.

“I’m sorry, it’s my fault.” Jim frowned, “I’m just...” Jim paused, thinking about how to phrase it more properly “This morning, when Benjamin and I went to the Northern District, he told me something, I just thought that you should know it!”

“What is it?” Louise asked. Jim wasn’t a bad guy, so Louise decided to listen to what he was going to say.

“Benjamin said, maybe, just maybe, Zach will turn you into his descendant.”

Louis raised her eyebrows: “Me? Become his descendant? How?”

...

Now, please think about such a question. How did you learn the process of a vampire making another vampire? Let me hear it... Oh, so it’s all ‘standard’ methods, TV, the Internet, novels... Okay, I got it.

Let me turn on the ten-inch TV in Zach’s room on the second floor of the Grande Funeral Home. Hmm... A housewife in an apron is teaching everyone to make cakes, a solo talk show, a woman with a waterfall hair-style is reporting news, a pregnant woman is undressing in front of the priest... hmm... No, no vampire making descendants.

Web, you say? You must be referring to the spider web in the corner of the Grande Funeral Home’s basement. When I asked it this question, this little ungrateful guy almost bit me.

Novels, this seems possible. That is something made by a machine called a typewriter. It is also something that I am currently using, and something that cost Zach a hundred Dor…

Maybe I should remind Zach that it’s almost out of ink. 𝑓𝘳ℯ𝒆w𝘦𝘣𝙣𝘰ѵ𝘦𝚕.c𝗼𝓶

Anyway, I think I made my point.