The Silly Alchemist

I will be online on the alchemist Discord channel at 8th Nov 2020, 1am GMT 8+ (or 1pm -7th Nov- New York Time I think?) to celebrate the end of The Silly Alchemist. Come say hi! I love talking to you guys.

Finale chapter will be released at 12 am, which is one hour before the discord hangout session. See ya!

To be honest, Ye Lang had long forgotten about all the evil deeds Zhao Yarou had once done. Now, he just thought she was a great sister-in-law. Her company wasn’t a bad thing at all.

During these three years, she had completely abandoned her empress facade and learned how to care for him- although it was all very chaotic in the beginning. She had made so many hilarious mistakes that Ye Lang didn’t know to laugh or cry.

But they both had lots of warm and happy memories!

Zhao Yarou had always been a resilient person. She would never give up on something she thought she could do. Ye Lang had no doubt on this because she had proven this again and again.

Just like that, Zhao Yarou slowly picked up many skills. She became talented in sewing, food and housekeeping. With her psychotic personality and absurd talent, he had to admit that nothing could stop her.

In terms of culinary skills, Zhao Yarou had learned from Ye Lang, read the resources in the book tower and tested on her own. Very soon, she had won his stomach over and his view of her improved by the day.

At this point, Zhao Yarou truly understood that winning a man’s heart was easy. You could just start with winning his stomach over, at least this was the case with Ye Lang.

As long as you made good food for him, he seemed to treat you better. She also understood why he liked Zhen Xiaoyan so much.

It wasn’t because of her sweet personality, it was also because of her cooking.

She also asked him about her cooking compared to Zhen Xiaoyan’s but received a very frustrating answer that never changed.

Ye Lang’s answer was forever this— Fatty’s food is the best but yours is great too!

Due to natural talent, no matter how hard she worked, she would never be able to exceed Zhen Xiaoyan. Zhen Xiaoyan didn’t just have a natural talent, she worked hard too.

This meant that while Zhao Yarou worked hard, Zhen Xiaoyan worked hard too. Since Zhen Xiaoyan was born with more talent in this area, Zhao Yarou would never be able to overtake her.

However, Zhao Yarou still should work on improving herself. Ye Lang said the only way to exceed someone else is to first exceed yourself!

Zhao Yarou was just a little frustrated. She knew that everyone had their own strengths. Although her cooking wasn’t as good, she had other strengths.

Zhao Yarou thought her best advantage was that she got to spend time alone with Ye Lang, this was something no one could take away from her. She was also very grateful for this. Up till the end, she felt like this was the best decision she’d ever made.

Many people would’ve taken her spot, they just never had the chance!

“What are you laughing at? That’s rude! I was just thinking about an important problem, now I’ve lost the train of thought…” huffed Ye Lang.

“Stop thinking, let’s eat first! You have time anyway. After eating, we have to go plant vegetables in the garden. We’re running out of vegetables soon,” said Zhao Yarou, pulling him away.

“We are? Alright.” After that, he followed her out. Just as she said, they had a lot of time left. Only three years had passed, they had seven more years.

He could take his time with research but not with food. They understood this well!

They could not use space items in here. If they wanted to eat, they either had to farm it or take it from the storage.

Initially, the kitchen’s storage had huge amounts of food stored. At that point, they both never really paid attention to the stocks so all they did was eat. Both of them had lived their entire lives with everything cared for so naturally, they did not understand this concept.

Even worse, Zhao Yarou was the one in charge of cooking here. As an empress, she never had to do this. In the beginning, she had many failed cooking endeavours and those wasted lots of food.

In the end, they realised a serious problem– they had run out of food!

Ye Lang had to cultivate the Satiation Technique and make Satiation Pills for Zhao Yarou, then plant vegetables immediately. They planted a kind that grew the fastest. Thank goodness the seed store here was very well organised. After a week, they survived on vegetables as they waited for other crops to ripen.

They couldn’t just plant one type of fast-growing vegetable, they planted many crops. They weren’t going to make the same mistake twice.

Initially, Zhao Yarou was very interested in Ye Lang’s satiation cultivation. Also, she thought he was lying to her so she could have the satiation pills instead of him. She was very emotional and touched by this.

Of course, even after knowing that Ye Lang’s cultivation was effective, she was still very touched!

Ye Lang’s Satiation Technique was not related to any magical essence, plus his Internal Work (neigong) cultivation had attained a very high level. With just some training, he could remain satiated for a long time. If he were a beginner like Zhao Yarou, the effects wouldn’t last as long.

Zhao Yarou wanted to learn but he did not teach. This was because he would have to first teach her an entire system of knowledge about Internal Work. This wasn’t something Ye Lang intended to pass to anyone, not even Ye Lanyu and the rest so definitely not Zhao Yarou either.

Zhao Yarou could only clench her teeth, she didn’t say much about it either.

Ye Lang had been cultivating his Internal Work all along. After arriving here, he cultivated even more. This environment did not affect cultivation of Internal Work and martial arts.

Plus this place was like a forced retreat environment, hence his Internal Work started to improve quickly.

Ye Lang sensed that he was soon approaching a bottleneck and it was time for a proper retreat. This retreat was probably going to be a long time too, perhaps one and a half years.

Under such circumstances, he should have immediately gone into retreat but because he was interested in studying this space and alchemy, he did not put cultivation as his priority.

That was why Ye Lang still hadn’t gone into retreat, instead spending his days studying the alchemy resources left behind by the Tiangongyue tribe!

But no matter how much he put it off, what must come, will come…

One day, Ye lang felt like it was time for him to cultivate until he reached a breakthrough. If he did not go into retreat, it would affect his physical state and capabilities.

“Zhao Yarou!” Ye Lang looked at her as she cleaned up after their meal.

“What’s the matter, brother-in-law? Are you still hungry?” she asked gently. At this point, she was as gentle as her name was.

[Note: ‘柔 rou’ in Yarou means gentle/soft]

“No, I’m full! I need to talk to you about something. I might be in retreat for a while. During this period, you’ve got to take care of yourself,” instructed Ye Lang as if he was talking to a younger sister.

Although he wouldn’t admit it, after all this time, he already saw her as his own younger sister. The seventh princess’ younger sister was also his younger sister.

Before this, he just didn’t like her because of her actions. Right now, at least in here, he finally recognised her as family.

“Retreat? What do you mean?” she asked, confused.

She knew what retreat meant but martial artists and magicians went into retreat to meditate or cultivate their douqi. Without magical essence here, she didn’t understand how Ye Lang would go into retreat.

Ye Lang’s cultivation involved him sitting cross-legged; she just treated as him spacing out. When he cultivated his martial arts abilities, she thought that was just regular training. Martial arts could be practised without magic anyway.

“I’ll be cultivating in retreat. I should’ve done this a long time ago but I delayed it for research,” said Ye Lang.

“What are you cultivating? There’s no magical essence in here,” she said, stunned.

“It’s just my own cultivation, I don’t need magical essence. You can do it too. Don’t just cultivate your martial arts techniques, go train your douqi. Perhaps you’ll improve even faster like that,” said Ye Lang.

“??” Zhao Yarou did not understand.

She was a martial artist– many people knew this, though they did not know how strong she was.

Because she never had to use her abilities!

Ye Lang knew about this too. She did not hide her training from him, hence he had witnessed her abilities.

After that, Ye Lang truly understood that Zhao Yarou was a terrifying person and his prior feeling was right. Thank goodness he did not provoke her.

“Just don’t disturb me there… Also, take good care of yourself. I don’t want you to be starving when I come out of retreat…” said Ye Lang.

“I won’t! Once was enough, I won’t make the same mistake twice,” she said.

“Alright, I’ll be conducting my retreat in the martial arts arena. You can come look for me if there’s an emergency,” he said.

“Will it affect you if I come visit?” Zhao Yarou realised that he was talking about something she mustn’t do unless it was an absolute emergency.

“It will. The cultivation could go wrong, I might go insane, and my retreat will fail,” said Ye Lang casually as if they weren’t important.

“…” Zhao Yarou now understood she would never disturb him no matter what. Unless it was an absolute necessity.

Zhao Yarou was also very happy to hear that even if Ye Lang went insane from a cultivation gone wrong, he still wouldn’t abandon her.

“Be careful, I might also go into retreat…” she said with a smile.

“Mm!”

And just like that, Ye Lang went into retreat after three years in this place. Zhao Yarou regretted not asking him specifically how long he would take.

That was because Ye Lang stayed in there for two years. After countless times of ensuring that nothing happened to Ye Lang in there, she finally accepted this reality.

He hadn’t expected this either. He initially thought he’d need three more months but it took longer. Perhaps due to the delayed start of his retreat, his Internal Work was in an extremely explosive state, causing him to attain breakthroughs again and again.

If he was making such impressive progress, even ten years would be good for him!

But to Zhao Yarou, it was not good news. She was there alone, bored and miserable.

That was also why she started to go into retreat like him too. She went into multiple short retreats- relatively short compared to Ye Lang’s retreat, but each time she hit breakthroughs and gained many insights.

At this moment, Zhao Yarou also understood that douqi cultivation could be performed without external magical essence too. Under such circumstances, she could comprehend concepts she hadn’t come into contact before.

It was as powerful as cultivating in the outside world.

That was also why she made a mistake thinking that Ye Lang was cultivating douqi and magic for this comprehension, and not anything else.

“I’m out… Zhao Yarou, do you have any food…”

This was what Ye Lang said the moment he stepped out. He went to take a shower then looked for her.

Since there was no response, as if she hadn’t heard him, he thought she was just busy. She must’ve kept herself busy some way while he was inside.

After searching for a while, he gave up.

That was because he realised she must be in a retreat like him too.

It was a coincidence that she had just entered retreat when he left!

Without her, he had to prepare his own food.

“Not bad, Zhao Yarou. These crops are very pretty.” Ye Lang’s little vegetable garden was beautiful. Although they were just regular vegetables, she arranged them in a way that everything looked gorgeous and colourful.

This vegetable garden looked better than some flower gardens…

She must’ve been very bored to do this!

“Ahh! Who stole my vegetables!”

After she completed her retreat, as usual, she thought he was still in retreat and went to get some food. Upon arriving at the garden, she realised it was in a messy state.

It wasn’t very messy, just not as pretty as when she left it.

“Do people still steal vegetables these days?” asked Ye Lang, stunned.

“…” Zhao Yarou paused for a long time, then pounced…

“You jerk! How dare you steal my vegetables! I’ll let my dogs out to bite you!”

“…Are you the dog now?”

“…”

…

Not sure how much time had passed because Ye Lang and Zhao Yarou had lost track. At this point, they did not care when the ten-year mark would arrive.

One day, Ye Lang was studying alchemy after his cultivation when he realised something. He let out a very peculiar scream, as if he was very emotional.

“Brother-in-law, what the heck are you screaming about? I’m doing a facial, I shouldn’t be disturbed during a time like that…” Zhao Yarou sounded annoyed.

Ye Lang had made facial skincare masks when he was bored, much to Zhao Yarou’s joy. She said she wasn’t young anymore and must start to care for her skin.

At this point, she was already twenty-five/six, it was true she wasn’t very young anymore.

“Go do your facial, I’ll go look for something. This is a very interesting place, can’t believe this…” Ye Lang sounded very excited.

“What? What are you talking about?” Zhao Yarou peeled off her mask, washed her face and rushed out. She did all that in just a few seconds, not sure because of her high cultivation or she was afraid Ye Lang would do something shocking.

Here, even without magic, Ye Lang still managed to cause huge commotions. He had destroyed his laboratory many times here.

“This…”

“No way, how is it possible?” Zhao Yarou was surprised too. She was in more shock than him, not expecting to see this at all.

What did they find?

…

Ten years after Ye Lang and Zhao Yarou disappeared. Theoretically, this was the day they were supposed to return. If all went as planned, they should return from the Tiangongyue prison today, arriving in the ancient ruins once more.

This was a major event to the entire mainland, the highlight of the year. This would not be a calm, ordinary day.

Everyone knew that Ye Lang and Zhao Yarou’s return would cause a major change in the entire mainland, the kind that would flip the world upside down. Anyone in an advantageous position could lose their power instantly.

No matter the winning or losing sides, everyone thought about how Ye Lang and Zhao Yarou must be on separate sides. No one would allow both of them to be on the same side together.

These two sides were still the same: Soaring Sky vs the alliance of many powers!

Soaring Sky naturally wanted Zhao Yarou, while the rest wanted Ye Lang. At the same time, they did not want the other person to safely return to the other side. They must even grab both to their side if possible.

Today’s war looked like it was just for two people but everyone knew the importance of these two people. The people sent on this mission weren’t ordinary fighters, these were all elites.

However, there was an unexpected calm today. Everyone imagined fire and a violent fight between both sides, they should’ve fought the second they met each other.

Both sides were archnemeses, and the war had dragged on for such a long time.

Perhaps due to Ye Lang and Zhao Yarou’s return, they seemed to have ceased fire a month ago. Both sides set up defences but did not attach. This was either the calm before the storm, or that everyone was focused on getting Ye Lang and Zhao Yarou before making other arrangements.

These two people were the key to victory.

At such a critical moment, there was peculiar peace. There was no fighting. Everyone merely waited for Ye Lang and Zhao Yarou’s return.

Why? Was this really the calm before the storm?

Nope, it was all because of Li Yue, who had been guarding this place. She was the one who shushed everyone up. No matter the alliance or Soaring Sky, neither had a say here.

Soaring Sky hadn’t expected this.

They thought Li Yue would be here to only maintain order, stopping some people from entry or causing trouble- but only aimed at people from outside of Soaring Sky, not them.

In reality, Li Yue didn’t just shush the outsiders, she made the Soaring Sky people shut up too. She did not care who they were. As long as they were here, they must follow her rules.

Soaring Sky was initially upset with this but very soon learned to keep quiet. They realised that everyone in the ancient ruins seemed to only obey Li Yue’s orders unless Zhao Yarou had a separate command. But Zhao Yarou wasn’t here.

“Li Yue, you have to understand the situation. You shouldn’t let them in.”

The leader of Soaring Sky was here too. It was an important event, he must come too. And this place wasn’t far from Soaring Sky’s Imperial City.

He was referring to the Ye family, including Ye Lanyu and the rest, Vermilion Bird’s Princess Longji, Ai La’s little princess and Fei, Sheng City’s Xuan Yuanbing and the representative of the beastmen, Athena and…

The person Ye Lang loved most— Tigress!

[Countdown to finale chapter: T-6]