The Two Hundred and Eighty Pound Fat Girl and Her Five Husbands

"Come on, sweetie. Are you coming out, or do you want Mommy to kick down the door?"

"I'm coming, I'm coming! Stop rushing me."

Lin Zaozao pouted as she reluctantly emerged from the bathroom.

"Oh my! Look at my little darling, how adorable!"

Lin's Mother pulled Lin Zaozao in front of the mirror, admiring the reflection of the mature woman next to the little green dinosaur with smug satisfaction.

"Mm-hmm! With you as my little clown-lizard sidekick, Mommy looks absolutely smoking hot today."

Ignoring Lin Zaozao's long face, she dragged her daughter out of the hospital room.

Just as they reached the doorway, Lin's Mother turned back to her sulking daughter with a sweet smile.

"Don't pull that donkey face. Give Mommy a smile."

"I can't smile."

"Don't make me slap it out of you!"

"Hee hee hee..."

"That's more like it!"

Lin's Mother linked arms with Lin Zaozao and slipped on her sunglasses. In an instant, the image of an aloof, untouchable fashionista materialized.

And Lin Zaozao? She was reduced to the role of dinosaur-costumed bag carrier.

Lin Zaozao glared daggers at her mother's back as she strode ahead. She had just managed to time-travel back from ancient times to see her, and this was how her mother behaved?

Couldn't she at least pretend to be a caring mother for a moment, like other moms?

And where was her father? Probably holed up in his lab again!

Lin Zaozao gazed heavenward in exasperation.

She wanted to die!

Why had she even come back without Luo Luo?

What a glutton for punishment she was!

"Pinky, is that your precious daughter back from abroad?"

"Yes, she just returned. A bit of culture shock, so we're at the hospital for a check-up."

Outside the hospital, Lin's Mother affected a loving expression as she pulled Lin Zaozao to her side after running into an acquaintance.

"Zaozao, say hello to Uncle Bai."

"Hello, Uncle Bai."

Lin Zaozao automatically plastered on a picture-perfect smile as she greeted the man.

"Zaozao, you look adorable in that outfit."

"Thank you for the compliment, Uncle Bai."

Lin Zaozao's smile didn't reach her eyes as she responded.

"Well, Bai, we must be going! I'm taking Zaozao to the amusement park."

"Have fun, you two!"

After exchanging pleasantries with Uncle Bai, Lin's Mother walked to the car and bundled Lin Zaozao inside.

"Mom, where are we really going?"

"Didn't I just say? The amusement park."

"As if!"

Sitting in the passenger seat, Lin Zaozao wore an expression of utter disbelief.

Given her mother's youthful appearance, the last time they'd gone to an amusement park, Lin's Mother had been mistaken for a child herself.

Since then, she'd never taken Lin Zaozao to one again. Now, dressed to the nines, there was no way she actually intended to go to an amusement park.

Sure enough, just as Lin Zaozao had suspected, the place Lin's Mother had brought her to was a bar!

"Mom, bars aren't open during the day. Why did you bring me here?"

Lin Zaozao looked up at the bar, perplexed.

"Silly girl, haven't I always told you money makes the world go round? Even if they're closed, throw enough cash their way and they'll come running to serve you, even if they have to get off the toilet to do it. Besides, are you blind? Can't you see this is your mother's latest green business venture?"

Lin's Mother tapped Lin Zaozao on the head before sashaying towards the bar in her sky-high heels.

Watching her mother's retreating figure, Lin Zaozao glanced up at the sign above the entrance. Indeed, this was her mother's newly opened bar!

With a small sigh, Lin Zaozao trudged dejectedly into the bar. But as soon as she entered, she found herself stuck.

She turned back to the waiter standing at the entrance and said helplessly,

"Could you open the door for me?"

"Miss, you're already inside. Did you want to leave?"

"No, handsome. The door's caught on my tail. I can't move."

Lin Zaozao tugged at the long green tail attached to her backside, looking rather defeated.

"Oh! Right, I'm so sorry! I didn't notice."

The waiter at the door quickly opened it wider, freeing Lin Zaozao's long dinosaur tail.

Clutching her tail, Lin Zaozao shot a glance at the waiter trying not to laugh, and could only hang her head as she walked further into the bar.

As soon as she rounded the corner, she heard the waiter's muffled laughter.

Damn it, how infuriating.

"Zaozao, come eat!"

Hearing Ms. Zhao Shufen's call, Lin Zaozao walked over expressionlessly, eyeing the spread of burgers, KFC fries, and cola on the table.

"Mom, couldn't we eat at an actual KFC? Why here?"

"The ambiance is better here!"

Lin's Mother said haughtily, nibbling on a fry with her pinky extended.

"Tch! What a poser!"

"What was that, you little brat? Say it again, I dare you!"

"I didn't say anything."

Lin Zaozao picked up a burger and shoved it into her mouth without expression. After one bite, she set it down, unimpressed.

"Eating burgers every day... they're not nearly as good as Dashan's flatbread."

"Who's Dashan?"

Lin's Mother asked, puzzled.

"My bodyguard."

"Is that so? Hurry up and eat, kiddo. When you're done, Mommy's got a big surprise for you."

"Really?"

"I brought you all the way here, didn't I? Of course it's real."

Meeting her mother's mischievous gaze, Lin Zaozao could only pick up the burger again and take another reluctant bite, curiosity piqued.

Hmm! Still tastes awful.

From childhood till now, it had always been burgers or snacks. She'd been raised on junk food by her mother - the fact that she'd grown up healthy was a miracle in itself.

After another bite of the burger, Lin Zaozao washed it down with some cola and declared herself full.

"I'm done eating. Where's the surprise?"

Lin Zaozao crossed her arms, looking expectantly at Lin's Mother sitting across from her.

"You're full? Perfect."

Lin's Mother removed her sunglasses and snapped her fingers at the bartender.

In the next instant, the dimly lit bar suddenly blazed with light.

Lin Zaozao instinctively squeezed her eyes shut at the sudden brightness. But when she opened them again, she saw a parade of handsome men emerging from behind the bar.

These hunks were all shirtless, wearing identical black shorts. They stood with their hands behind their backs, gazing at her with serious expressions.

As her eyes traveled over their chiseled six-packs, Lin Zaozao's previously bored expression instantly lit up with interest.

This gift...

Hehe...

She loves it so much!