Tomodachi no Imouto ga Ore ni Dake Uzai

When I made my way back to the inn, the sun had already gone down the horizon. Walking down the street, barren of street lights for illumination, I used my smartphone to guide the way back to the inn. For obvious reasons, the sheer sight of the inn looked even more ominous than during the afternoon. Hearing a bird giving out creepy caws in the distance, together with that heavy rumbling out of nowhere was a bit too much for the atmosphere, don’t you think? Every little detail was working towards making the inn look all the more terrifying. I mean, being able to gather so much data and learn new ways of inflicting fear and terror will surely be helpful for ‘Black Goat’, so from an efficiency point of view, it sure is valuable, but… 𝒇𝐫ℯ𝑒𝒘ℯ𝑏n𝑜ѵ𝐞l.c𝗼𝗺

“Good work today. You sure came back late.”

“Whooooooooooooooo?!”

“Oh? Why are you screaming like you just saw a ghost?”

“Eh…A-Ahh, the proprietress…”

I let out an uncontrollable scream as suddenly a ghost of the deceased jumped towards me, but upon closer look, I realized that it was just the proprietress I had seen earlier this afternoon. I do feel bad for screaming right in her face, but I’d appreciate it if she didn’t work in ways that caused heart attacks.

“You only had the other people from your group check into the room, right? I thought of leading you there since you probably didn’t know where to go, which is why I’ve been waiting for your arrival.”

“I-Is that so. Thank you very much for that.”

I was about to call them and have them pick me up, but maybe this is an expected courtesy in rural regions like this. Either way, I just remained quiet and let her show me around.

“Right this way.”

“Thank you very much.”

Following her lead, we went up to the second floor. Walking down the expanding hallway, she stopped in front of a certain room. ‘Bellflower Room,’ the words on the door read. Turning over towards the proprietress, I gave a deep bow.

“I’m sorry for having to make you go this far.”

“Don’t be. Doing this is part of my job after all.”

With a faint smile, she turned around on her heel. However, she soon came to a sudden stop, as if she’d just remembered something.

“Ahh, that reminds me. I’ve already told the other two. You cannot enter the adjacent ‘Iris Room’ under any circumstances.”

“Okay… Well, I wouldn’t enter another room anyway.”

“It appears to be ‘cursed’, see.”

“Eh? What do you mean by—”

A suspicious-sounding word entered my ears, so I asked again. But apparently, the old lady wasn’t a big fan of that, as she’d already started to walk away.

“Please be careful about that. Hooooohohoho!”

Does she actually mean ‘curse1’? I really wish she wouldn’t say such ominous and easily misinterpretable stuff about the room right next to ours. Either way, I went to open the door of the Bellflower Room and stepped inside. And there, Iroha was dead.

Turning on the light, I could see the outline of the room more clearly, both prosperous and comfortable-looking. On the floor, sitting cushions were distributed. And Iroha is still dead.

It was said that this place had a warm bath free of use, but to think that even the rooms had that service, what luxury. Since I didn’t see Ozu anywhere, he’d probably went for a walk, or took the opportunity to take a bath. Alright, since I’m tired from the battle at Kageishi mansion, all there’s left to do—

“Is to take a warm bath, yeah!”

“This isn’t the time to be taking a bath! Don’t just ignore me like that!” Iroha said with tears in her eyes.

Right after I opened the door, I saw her leaning against the wall, with the hilt of a knife sticking out from her chest. I figured that she was probably going to tease me, so I didn’t pay that any mind.

“It’s horrible of you to show no reaction whatsoever when your precious Kouhai was just murdered!”

“You say that, but it was obvious you were just playing dead. You’ve got a knife in your body, but there’s no blood whatsoever.”

“There are murders that happen without blood being shed, you know?!”

“Well, you’re not wrong there…and I honestly wouldn’t be too shocked if there was actually some weird murder in this inn…”

As long as there aren’t any high school detectives sleeping over, we should be fine. Probably.

She gave me a strong, displeased pout, then pulled the knife out of her chest. Apparently she’d put a toy knife in between the buttons of her clothes, stuffing it in her cleavage. How versatile is that chest of yours? And why do they have to be so big?

“Oh well, I did prepare seven items like this to scare you.”

“So there are still six left… You really did prepare a lot just to tease me.”

“It’s Iroha-chan’s reason for living, after all~”

“Let’s look for a better reason, okay…?” I sighed.

But shortly after, that toy knife in Iroha’s hands piqued my interest.

“I feel like I’ve seen that knife before somewhere.”

“I borrowed it from the theatre club, after all. President Midori and I are real close friends now.”

“Ahh, the one that she tried to stab me with before… To think I’d see it again at a time like this.”

“Also, Senpai, you took way too long!”

“Hm?”

“There’s nothing interesting to watch on TV, my smartphone doesn’t have unlimited data, and there was no Senpai to tease… I was so bored I might have actually died!”

“How about playing some old maid with Ozu?”

“Playing one-on-one against Onii-chan is like torture… Also, he walked off right after we checked in, saying he found something interesting.”

“Ahh, I see. So he was stimulated by his curiosity. He sure is free-spirited.”

“What are you talking about? You were the one who trained him to be like that, weren’t you, Senpai?”

“Well, I guess so. Still, he sure takes things to the extreme.”

Back in middle school, when Ozu was only interested in anything PC-related, constantly creating misunderstandings with his classmates, I was the one who gave him advice. Look at things more actively, get interested in things, get up close to things…and so on. He didn’t have to understand it. It was fine if he thought something was confusing and later forgot, as long as he was interested. That’s what I told him.

And as a result of that, Ozu kept making new encounters all the time. Like, an irregular amount. So much that I started seeing him like a protagonist.

“Aaannyyway, enough about thaaaat! I’m bored! So bored!”

Iroha did a dive backwards onto the futon butt-first, flapping her legs up and down. Wrapped in kneesocks, they were—Hm?

“So you’re not barefooted. Even though you’re always making yourself as comfortable as possible.”

“Mmm~” Stopping her feet at once, Iroha looked straight at me.

If you stop in that pose, I can get a full view of your thighs. I don’t know where to look, so could you please not?

“Well, I thought it’d be kinda rude to just walk around here barefoot.”

“So why are you always walking around barefoot in my house? It’s not like you live there.”

“But Senpai’s room is my room, something like that~!”

“Just take it easy on me…”

Having gotten tired of my conversation with Iroha, I sat down right where I stood. Even my strength to walk over to the bath had dissipated. But it’s not like talking with Iroha relieved all the tension that was left over from my conversation with the head of the Kageishi family earlier. Let me emphasize that last part. Yeah.

“That reminds me, Senpai, have you heard?”

“About what?”

Iroha spoke up as she rolled around on the tatami mat like a cat.

“From the proprietress. That we cannot enter the ‘Iris Room’ under any circumstances.”

“Ahh, you mean that.”

With prompting from Iroha, I remembered what the proprietress had told me.

“Feels really uncomfortable, doesn’t it? And it had to be the room right next to ours. Maybe some ghost will jump at us when we go to the bathroom?”

“It should be fine as long as we don’t enter it, right? No need to be scared.”

“You definitely raised a flag, Senpai. Then, we’re going to hear the voice of a ghost and—”

“Uuuuugh…”

“—Eh?!”

Iroha jumped away from the wall.

“S-Senpai, that voice just now…”

“You’re taking this too far. You really thought it’d work against me again?”

Truth be told, as of recently, I’ve been scared many, many times by Iroha’s horrific voice. But the reason I was scared… Correction, surprised was because of an instinctive feeling of disgust. Once I’m prepared and know that the other person is Iroha, it’s not that surprising anymore. Though it pisses me off that she’d randomly use a voice like that.

“N-No, Senpai, I didn’t say anything! It was from the room next-door…”

“Yeah yeah, boo-hoo so scary.”

“Listen to me! I really did hear it from the room next to us, see?!”

Iroha put both hands over her mouth like the ‘Speak no evil’ of the Three Wise Monkeys of the Toshogu Shrine in Nikko prefecture2. Can she even get a voice out like that…?

“Not enough… Not…enough…”

The second after, I heard that groan of suffering again.

“Seeeeeee?! You heard it as well, right?! You definitely did, right?!”

“I-Iroha, you’re pretty amazing, being able to create that horrific voice through ventriloquism!”

“Don’t deny reality!”

“Then explain what’s happening in a realistic way! I don’t like this occult horror kinda flow!”

“How should I know?! Also, is this inn actually cursed?!”

“Wait, calm down, let’s rationally sort things out. At times like these, the hint towards a strategy always lies within the phrases the vengeful ghost is muttering. Basically—”

“—If we carefully listen to it, we might find a way to get rid of it?!”

“Exactly. I know it must be tough, so please put up with it, and carefully listen—Welp, I’m counting on you!”

“Ehhhh, no way! Senpai, you be the one to stay here and listen!”

Pushing Iroha against the wall, her face went pale as she responded in a panic. In the end, the two of us approached the wall at the same time, one step at a time, until we could hear the mumbling more clearly.

“Not enough…not enough… More…”

“Eeeek!”

Iroha twitched heavily and looked over towards me with tears in her eyes. This really doesn’t seem like acting anymore. I couldn’t imagine that Iroha would go this far, shaking and crying just to tease me.

“It has to be that one, that famous one! The one that goes ‘one…two…’ you know!”

“Banchou Sara Yashiki3, huh? It’s an old horror story from the Edo period, but this village has a fitting atmosphere…”

“No doubt about it. Let’s keep listening so we can find out about her regrets.”

“Fifty-one… Fifty-two… Not enough…”

“…Isn’t that a bit too many?”

If I heard that right, she just said 51 and 52. I don’t know how many plates she lost, but this is way more than in the original source.

“She probably lost more as time went on.”

“Pretty sloppy explanation. Are you sure that this is really a ghost?”

I was starting to get a bit more doubtful. Also, I feel like I’ve heard that voice before somewhere. But, before I could give it any more thought—

“Get away from that wall, right now. You’re better off not listening to that voice.”

As we were suddenly spoken to from behind, we hurriedly turned around, only to find Ozu standing there.

“Ozu…! What have you been doing until now?”

“I found some weird shed as I was walking around. It piqued my interest, so I went to check it out, and I found a secluded room back from the Edo period, with a feeble-looking girl in there.”

“I probably don’t need to ask, but that really happened, right? That totally sounds like she’d be the heroine of an eroge.”

“Of course that happened. I heard the rumour about the ‘Iris Room’ from her, after all.”

With those words, Ozu passed through the room, sitting down deep into the massage chair. Following Ozu, Iroha and I separated ourselves from the wall and sat down on the nearby chairs.

“The ‘Iris’ from ‘Iris Room’ can also mean murder—meaning that it’s a ‘Room of Murder4’.”

“‘Room of Murder’…”

Saying such dirty words, I naturally gulped.

“I don’t know the specifics, but there’s no doubt that it’s about that room.”

“So some crime happened here? Hey, it’s not too late, let’s go change rooms.”

“A-Agreed! We’re finally on our trip, and getting cursed really doesn’t fit into my idea of fun!”

“Just a minute. There isn’t anywhere to run to in this village.” Ozu looked outside, into the pitch-black darkness.

The moon was shining down, dazzling. That faint light illuminated the otherwise jet-black village.

“There’s actually a nursery song in this village. It’s called ‘The Little Bird’.”

“The little bird… Don’t tell me…!”

“You know it, Senpai?”

“Yeah. On our way to the Kageishi Family household, Sumire and I heard some kids sing it.”

“The ‘Little Bird’ is actually ‘Catch-the-child’—Basically, it hints that children are getting abducted. When children leave the house at night, they hear this ‘The Little Bird’ song and get taken somewhere.”

“So ‘Room of Murder’ and a song about abducting children… Everything is full of mysteries, and there’s nowhere to run.”

“Exactly. In order to avoid hearing that mumbling, all we can do is gather up close and sleep on the opposite side of the room. It’ll be narrow, I’m sure, so you can go ahead and use the futon.”

“No no, Ozu, you can go and use the futon. You must be tired, right?”

“It’s fine, really. I want to sleep here,” said Ozu, as he turned on the massage chair.

After that, the chair started vibrating, and Ozu’s expression started to relax.

“Ahhhh~~~~ My stiff back is melting away…”

Being the desk type he is, on top of having prepared a lot for this trip, this relaxation must be quite effective right now. Well, if Ozu says it’s fine, then we should just move ahead with this.

“Senpai, what should we do?”

“Well…”

I still can’t fully believe Ozu’s words. I know that Ozu is the person to meet girls left, right, and center, and that all his previous encounters sound like eroge encounters with heroines, but I’ve never once seen one actually happen. On top of that, I don’t see any reason he’d blindly trust a girl he’s only met once.

Iroha still looks frightened, with worry painted all over her face. I can clearly feel her trembling through the fist grabbing onto my sleeve. It should be my duty as a man to make sure that this anxiety of hers disperses as quickly as possible. And it’s not due to the Japanese social obligation hammered into me, but rather my own policy.

“I got it. Let’s sleep in the corner… But you shall not disturb my sleep, alright?”

“I-I won’t do that! I really don’t have the leisure to do that today!”

“Good. Then it’s a temporary ceasefire for tonight. Alright?”

“…Understood!” Iroha gave a salute.

Even the most annoying girl like her doesn’t have the guts to keep going if she’s scared, huh? Maybe I can actually use this to my advantage? Fix her annoying attitude by using techniques to become a mountain ascetic, and further our efficiency?

—No, I can’t. If things go bad, I’d end up getting cursed myself, and that would lower my efficiency. And even if I tried to flip her attitude, I’m not sure if I’d have the necessary skills. With this risk vs reward proposition, the gamble is way too great. Yeah, let’s not. Totally not because I’m really scared of that ghost, okay?

Anyway, Iroha, Ozu, and I went ahead to sleep in the room for the night, under the wariness of the vengeful ghost next to us, hoping that nothing would happen. And against our prayers, of course something had to happen.

*

“This is…way too much of a scandal…”

It was late at night. I wasn’t able to check the clock, but it must have been around 2 am. The time known as the dead of night. At this time, when I would normally be sound asleep, my eyes were wide-open, my mind completely clear.

After what had happened, all of us went to take baths at our own timings, and after enjoying our open-air baths, we returned to the room to sleep. Naturally, nothing would happen, right?

“Mmmm… Munyamunya… Fenfai…”

“I can’t sleep…”

The reason I can’t sleep—Kohinata Iroha was sound asleep, with a happy expression on her face. Twenty seconds after we slipped into the futons, she quickly dozed off. That in itself wasn’t a bad thing by any means, and I was happy that she did. Getting a lot of sleep, with a calm rhythm like her, ensures a state of well-preparedness for the following day. So there’s nothing to complain about here.

But can someone explain to me why exactly she’s embracing my arm, while using it as a pillow?

Just as Ozu suggested, we ended up sleeping in the futons on the opposite wall of the ‘Iris Room’, so Iroha and I slipped into our own respective futons. Or so it should have been that way, but when I woke up, I found myself in this situation. You may think that I’m being weird, but that really is the case. I don’t remember her having such bad sleeping habits.

Since she’d went to bed right after her bath, she was wearing the type of yukata that you would often use at inns. Though I don’t know if she actually did put on any underwear, judging from the gaps I’ve been seeing whenever she presses herself against me. Running a mental simulation, I came to the conclusion that she wasn’t wearing any. Meaning that an adolescent high school boy like me could only try his best not to stare.

“Idiot, sleeping defenselessly like that…”

As my heart was thumping wildly in my chest, I gently tried to extract my arm from her grasp.

Just when I thought that my arm was freed of that soft sensation, Iroha suddenly let out a soft moan, and…

“Don’t go…”

“?!”

Iroha’s arms were flailing around, looking for mine. As I silently observed her, like a kid separated from their parents, I felt a twinge in my chest. Was she dreaming of such sad memories?

“I don’t want you to go… Stay…”

“Iroha…”

I stopped pulling away my arm, and after a bit more flailing, Iroha caught it and once again clung on to it.

“…Ah~” She let out a happy voice.

Her expression relaxed as well. And then…

“Really, you can’t just cum like that. You prematurely ejaculating Senpai~ …Munya munya…”

“Nevermind. Get off of me.” And once again, I ripped my arm away.

This time, Iroha didn’t resist at all. Quietly, she giggled to herself, “fufu”. She’s probably enjoying a ‘Teasing Senpai Time~’ dream. Also, doesn’t this mean that I win the bet we established? You said I’d get to fondle your chest as much as I want, so you’d better be prepared.

Well, not like I’d actually do it. I mean, I can’t exactly accuse her of annoying me when she wasn’t even awake, and it’s not like she was consciously breaking that promise. Either way, I can’t sleep like this. If I stay any closer, I might even catch some of her annoying genes.

“…What to do, what to do?”

It’s true that I’ve managed to suppress the lust that was triggered by the defenseless Iroha, but the fact that I’ve got nothing to do now doesn’t change. Maybe I should read a book online. Reading some grammatical conjugations in a workbook will surely move me to sleep.

Deciding on that, I took a step towards the middle of the room to pick up my smartphone. Then—

Click… Click… Tap… Click, Tap…

From across the wall, the ‘Iris Room’, I heard a tapping sound, although only faintly. It went on in a rhythm, and once I thought it was starting to pick up speed, it came to a sudden stop several seconds later, only to restart again. There was no clear pattern I could discern of.

The sound felt oddly familiar to me, but I couldn’t make out for the life of me as to where I’d previously heard it. It was a very important sound. A sound I should never forget. And, as if to stop my thoughts in their tracks, I heard a feeble voice from across the door.

“Uuu… Aki… Aki…”

“Eh?”

I felt like I just heard my name in there. It shouldn’t be possible, but it just said “Aki”. As I put my ear to the wall again, I heard that tapping sound, and—

“Aki… Aki…”

Again. There’s no mistaking it. I definitely heard an “Aki” in there. No, this might just be a coincidence. Nothing to do with me, words addressed towards someone else.

“Now that I’m hearing this, I can’t just fall asleep…!”

I couldn’t understand how some vengeful ghost in a distant village, cut off from the world, would mutter my name. No way would I be able to go back to sleep with all these doubts still lingering. At this rate, my lack of sleep will lessen my productivity tomorrow and throw me out of rhythm. Of course, I’m not scared in the slightest, but—No, let’s stop with that. I’m scared. So scared that my legs might start shaking at any second now. But there are things I can’t back down from out of fear. I will stand proud against this ghost, defend my own lifestyle, my own days built up with my efficiency… Although I’m really freaking scared!

I picked up my smartphone. Grabbing my bag, I took out around ten of the papers I got from the shrine. My preparations were complete. Stepping out of the ‘Bellflower Room’, I stepped into the pitch-black hallway. In this void of darkness, where I couldn’t even see the tip of my nose, I used my smartphone’s flashlight to light the way. It was a surprise that I could even walk straight, as my legs were about break down out of fear. In order to avoid that, I tapped myself on the legs, trying to subdue the shaking, and stood in front of the ‘Iris Room’

No entrance! Dangerous to open! Cursed! Don’t bother! Do not open! Three days left to live, max!

Several papers were pinned on the door. It seemed it really was about a curse. As I came to that realization, my legs froze up. Even so, the heavy tapping sound and the faint, husky calling of my name continued. Walking away wasn’t an option. I heavily gulped, and was about to knock on the door—

Lit~tle Bird~ Lit-tle Bird~

“—?!”

My hand froze mid-air. I heard a cheerful, female singing voice. Not to mention that it came from deeper into the hallway. Not from the ‘Iris Room’, but rather from the one that had ‘Canary Room’ written on it. It was still in the middle of the night. At this time when even adults should be sleeping, someone was singing. And, that phrase…

Lit-tle bird~ Lit-tle bird~ A little bird salesman~ Came visiting us

Lit-tle bird~ Lit-tle bird~ A chirping child~ Sold to us

The Parents in the East, the Sun in the West~ Afternoon snack~ Bring it to us

The Parents in the East, the Sun in the West~ Afternoon snack~ Bring it to us

It was the cursed nursery song. Why am I hearing that at such a cursed time? Are you joking with me? Even at this hour, when I’m trying to uncover the identity of the ghost, they came to play ‘Catch-the-child’ with children—me. Shit. Bothering me at the worst timing. Is it that fun to scare me like this? I was getting more and more pissed by the second. This dark feeling, slowly starting to burn strongly within me, where have I experienced that before?

—I know. It’s because of Iroha. It’s the same reaction I had when Iroha was scaring me for fun. I see. So this is the vengeful spirit’s way of being annoying. When I looked at it that way, rather than fear and terror, I felt anger, and adrenaline started flowing through my veins. As if I’d step down now! You’d better prepare yourself, you shitty joke of a ghost.

Just curse me to death for all I care. You think you’d win with just that?! Ha, you moron, I can just use that situation as a scenario that might happen in ‘Black Goat’ and use it to raise the quality of our game even more, what do you say now?! Come on, how about you greet me?! Look, I’m even knocking for you!!!

In response to my knock, the tapping sound stopped, as well as the ‘Aki’ mumbling. And then, slowly…oh so slowly, the door opened.

A stare.

From within the small crack in the opening, burning red eyes glared at me. As soon as our eyes met, I felt an insane killing intent coming from them. A skinny, almost dangerously skinny face. Ashen white hair. Completely in contrast to her blood red eyes, she had pure white skin. Seeing this, the only emotion I felt was ‘Regret’. I couldn’t very well turn back any more, but I wished I’d have just ignored this irregularity, so I could have lived on to see another day. Both me and those bloodshot eyes were unable to look away. And then.

“Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah?!”

“Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?!”

Our screams overlapped.

Naturally, I screamed out because I was scared for my life. I’d give it a perfect 100 for such a nice death scream of agony, really. The other one wasn’t bad either. Like the sort of scream you’d hear from a victim in some shark movie, the kind of scream where you wouldn’t see what happened, but could tell that they died from the how terrifying the sound was. Quite the beautiful scream, if I must say so myself.

—But why is the vengeful spirit screaming along with me?

“What’s happened, chirp?!”

Not to mention that a new female character stormed out of the ‘Canary Room’.

“Senpai, what’s wrong?!”

“Did something interesting finally happen?”

On top of that, even Ozu and Iroha came over from our own room.

“Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Pervert! Deviant! Die!”

“Who’s a pervert?! Don’t try to play the victim here, you bastard of a vengeful spirit!”

“Hey, you pervert over there! Get away from her, chirp!”

“Chirp chirp chirp chirp shut up! Don’t add some weird trait to your otherwise weak character!”

“Get away from Senpai, you ghost!”

“Aki, can you explain what’s happening right now?”

“Don’t just all talk at the same time, will you?!”

Of course, what ensued was chaos. Nobody knew what was happening. Also, what do you mean by pervert? I was called here by that ghost after—Hm?

“Mashiro…?”

“A…ki…?”

The vengeful ghost and I both realized the truth at the same time, gazing at each other’s faces. By doing so, I realized that there wasn’t a ghost with bloodshot eyes or a pale expression, but rather a girl I knew very well.

“You are… No way…”

“I-It’s Aki…? Eh? Why…are you here?”

Our neighbor turned out to be my cousin and fake girlfriend, Tsukinomori Mashiro.

*

In order to fully assess the situation, we all gathered in our ‘Bellflower Room’. Since we had caused quite the racket, the proprietress came up to the second floor to check on us, but after apologizing and explaining the situation, she vanished again, telling us that she didn’t mind. Apparently the only ones currently using this inn were us, Mashiro, and that girl, so there weren’t any other guests we bothered.

That’s what you’d expect from a remote village like this. That said, are they going to be okay with such low traffic? Leaving that aside, we all sat around the low table. Iroha, Ozu, me, Mashiro, and that weird chirp-adding girl.

“Ummm, so basically, the one staying over in the ‘Iris Room’ is actually Mashiro…right?”

“Y-Yeah…”

“Even though you said you didn’t have the time to come with us…?”

“T-That’s Mashiro’s question. Weren’t you all supposed to be going to the sea?”

“Yeah, we were, but there was a sudden change in plans. We had to take a stop to meet Sumire-sensei’s family. We were meeting the current head of the Kageishi Family.”

“Huh?”

“B-Because of our fake engagement. Your bloodshot eyes are really scary, so don’t glare at me like that, okay?”

If I had a sanity value, I probably would have depleted that just today alone. Also, enough about us already.

“Why are you even here, Mashiro-senpai? And who’s that frilly chirp chirp girl over there?”

Precisely. Good job, Iroha. The person who I’m most interested in right now, the girl sitting in the corner, adding chirp chirp after every sentence, was all quiet. Her appearance led me to guess she was a grade schooler in her later years, or middle school at most. She was a blonde-haired girl, styled like you would see in many western dramas. Even this late at night, she was wearing a gothic dress, like the kind of eccentric girl that’d take out an umbrella in her own room just to fit her sense of fashion.

In response to Iroha’s question, the girl put one hand to her ear and spoke up.

“Ehh~? Who was the one who just called Kanaria-chan the cutest girl in the whole world~? Kanari-chan is everyone’s idol, so no making advances on her, okay, chirp?”

“………”

Iroha just gazed over at me, her eyes dead as can be. No, don’t look at me like that. I don’t know what to think myself. Who’s this girl? Why is she striking such a pose and adding ‘chirp’ at the end? She wants to be cute? Please, the cringe is killing me.

“Really, none of you are even close to being motivated enough! Even though I showed you all something that only Kanaria-chan’s fans would get to see, chirp! Chirp chirp! Kanaria-chan is angry now, chirp!”

“Fan? Are you some sort of underground idol?”

“Ehhhhhh?! You don’t know about Kanaria-chan? Now she’s angry, chirp!”

“Gaaaaaaaaaah! Senpai, what do we do with this girl?! She’s threatening to take over my existence with how annoying she is!”

“Don’t worry, Iroha. I completely agree with you. I didn’t expect that someone even more annoying than you would just appear.”

Actions, pose, voice. Perfect, down to an art. The art of being annoying, that is.

“Keep your ears cleansies weansies and listen closely!”

The girl gave us a wink, sparkle, and made a peace sign.

“Chance of additional printing, 100%! [Fun] is right here! Be it comedy, tragedy, or drama, Kanaria-chan will deliver it all! Kiraboshi Kanaria, the idol editor of UZA Publishing, 17 years old! Pleased to meet you, chirp!”

She gave a short, rhythmic introduction… Also, I feel like I’ve heard that name before somewhere. Something was unearthed from the depths of my memories, and I raised my eyebrows. Kiraboshi Kanaria… No, wait a second, did she just say UZA Publishing?

“Ah… Ahhh! I remember! You were all over the social networks, right?! The ace editor of UZA, the one in charge of Makigai Namako-sensei!”

“Ding dong! Correct, chirp!”

UZA Publishing is a rather famous label, with many of its editors having significant social media presence. However, there is one who conducts only events, CD sales of live shows, a signing session only for the ditor, and acts like an idol online, precisely this girl—No, this woman who’s the Kiraboshi Kanaria in front of us. Although there might be both benefits and drawbacks to it, she was able to sniff up the next big hits with her insane efforts in the industry and her sixth sense. The novels she manages always end up quickly reprinting after the first release.

“Why is Makigai Namako-sensei’s editor here… And with Mashiro…?”

“Ah… U… Um…” Mashiro went pale.

She seemed troubled, with her worried gaze wandering between Kanaria and me. Kanaria tilted her head in confusion.

“That’s because Mashiro-chan is Ma—”

“Mackinac Bridge!”

“Michigan?!”

With a motion like you were crossing a bridge, Mashiro reached out with her right hand to seal off Kanaria’s mouth. Kanaria tried to fight it, but since her grip seemed to be so strong, she found no success.

“What are you doing, chirp?! C-Can’t breathe…Give give!”

“U-Um, Kanaria-san—Kanaria-oneechan is actually Mashiro’s older sister.”

“Eh?! You’re sisters?”

“Y-Yeah. We just came here for a trip. Really, that’s all there is to it.”

“Mashiro… Did you always have an older sister?”

I went over to play at the Tsukinomori Family a lot when we were younger. If she had an older sister, I’d definitely remember. All I remember was Mashiro and an older brother. He was my cousin and friend, but there shouldn’t have been anyone else.

“…Oh, right.”

“Hey, hey.”

What’s with that reaction? Don’t just forget about the composition of your own family like that. So, who is this girl?

“U-Um, Aki. Don’t be shocked. This Onee-chan…is actually Mashiro’s Onii-chan.”

“Seriously? You had a sex change?”

I don’t think of it as special or anything, I just didn’t expect that. I was wondering what he was up to since I haven’t seen him in a while, but to think that he turned into a girl when I wasn’t looking.

“Wah, Mashiro-chan?! What are you talking about, chirp?! Kanaria-chan was always a—”

“Mm! Mmm!”

Mashiro let go of her hand, giving Kanaria the opportunity to speak. In response, Mashiro heavily blinked her eyes in succession. I don’t know why, but she’s probably trying to tell her something via eye contact? After that continued for a few seconds, Kanaria seemed to have grasped something as she spoke up.

“Yes, that’s correct, chirp! Kanaria-chan is Mashiro-chan’s Onii-chan! Before, she was a rascal who rode a motorcycle, but now Kanaria-chan is a full-fledged idol, chirp!”

“You’re a fake, I see.”

“How did you know?!”

“He had an accident with a bike before, getting into trauma. A motorcycle is like a bike, right? I can’t imagine him riding one after all that.”

“Ehhh, Kanaria-chan didn’t know of any setting like that, chirp! Also, acting like a completely random person is impossible, chirp!”

“S-Sorry…”

Being scolded by Kanaria, Mashiro shrunk back. It was more like a relationship between master and servant. Watching this unfold, I arrived at one conclusion. Those two definitely aren’t sisters, and most probably not even friends, either. So why are the two of them staying over in a remote village like this? One is the ace editor of UZA Publishing. The other is Mashiro, who has always been busy as of late. And now, Sumire’s words come back floating into my head.

“Apparently some people come here because they’re close to being abandoned, or because their deadline for manga or whatever is close. Since there are no places for recreation near here, you can focus on your work.”

Taking that into consideration, I arrived at one conclusion.

“Mashiro, you don’t have to hide it anymore. It’s alright, I understand now.”

“Eh…?! W-Wait, you’re wrong. This isn’t what you think…!” Mashiro panicked and waved about with both her arms.

In her palm, especially on her fingertips, I saw calluses which backed my theory. This pale, tired expression, that facial color, her bloodshot eyes, and calluses. There can only be one reason for this.

“Mashiro, you’ve been writing novels, right? And on this trip, you’re with an editor from UZA Publishing.”

“…! T-That’s…” Mashiro’s voice weakened and thinned out.

She really was bad at hiding stuff. She wears her emotions on her sleeve, and she quickly blurts out the truth when confronted. Now that she couldn’t firmly deny it, it’s obvious. In the past, Mashiro had been bullied by her classmates for writing novels. On top of that, she doesn’t seem to have much confidence in herself. That’s probably why she doesn’t want to talk about it. So she’s been keeping it a secret from me and the [5th Floor Alliance].

“So distant, really. I’m not going to get angry because you kept it a secret. I don’t have the right to do that, nor to judge you. But now that we’ve come this far, how about you stop playing dumb and just say it yourself?”

“Aki…” Mashiro formed a fist in front of her chest. “Aki, aren’t you disappointed? Mashiro kept it a secret all this time. Acting like she didn’t know, continuing to write, having these fantasies, not wanting anyone else to find out…” ƒ𝘳𝗲𝑒𝒘𝐞𝚋𝚗𝐨v𝘦l.𝒄o𝐦

“Fantasies acknowledged by a professional editor aren’t just fantasies. They have value, something worth selling. So have a bit more confidence in yourself. After all—” I smiled at Mashiro.

I made it as soft as possible, in order to quell Mashiro’s anxiety.

“Congratulations, Mashiro. You finally got yourself an editor. Not to mention that it’s the same one Makigai Namako has. That’s pretty amazing. I’m sure that your novel will be a big hit!”

“…Hm?”

“Rather than making it as far as winning a newbie prize, you actually got yourself an editor already, huh?”

“…Hmm?”

“UZA, of all places. So you’re Makigai Namako-sensei’s Kouhai now.”

“…Hmmm?”

“Anyway, since when did that happen? I totally thought you were going to submit your novel this summer break—”

“Wait a second.”

“Hm? What’s wrong?”

“Do you think that Mashiro is an aspiring author?”

“Yeah? Ah, in this case, it’s probably more accurate to say former aspiring author. But, maybe you’re still an amateur until your book releases? Hmmm…complicated.”

“W-Who cares about that now… Umm, erm…”

Mashiro put one hand on her head, thinking about something. And then, she pulled on Kanaria’s sleeve.

“Come with Mashiro for a second.”

“What’s wrong, chirp?”

Holed up in the corner of the room, Mashiro and Kanaria were whispering to each other. Watching that, Iroha came over to whisper at me.

“What do you think they’re talking about? Maybe she didn’t want us to find out that she’s writing novels?”

“Maybe. Though that kind of hurts…”

“Because you wanted to praise her for her hard work?”

“Don’t just read into my thoughts.”

“Aha~ I know everything there is to know about Senpai’s thoughts! You really are a nice person~”

“…Stop teasing me already.”

Also, is this really something worth being called a good person for? Mashiro became my fake girlfriend only to benefit the [5th Floor Alliance], but she’s not a member of it. Though I’m sure her novels will eventually be helpful, resourceful for sure, they hold no merit for the [5th Floor Alliance] and cause no change in efficiency for my own plans. Maybe that’s why this might qualify as being a good person, I guess, with this emotion of mine that clearly crosses the border of being in a relationship of advantages and disadvantages.

I never helped out Mashiro in any way. Neither did I give her support on getting herself a professional editor, nor did I give her any advice on how to write her own novel. These are all things that Mashiro worked up to for herself.

“Even cats and dogs can show appreciation for effort. I didn’t do anything to help her, so don’t call me a good person.”

“So twisted~ Well, that is a side of Senpai I really adore, though~” Iroha grinned.

Unable to hold the embarrassment, I averted my gaze. At the same time as our talk ended, Mashiro and Kanaria apparently finished their meeting and returned.

“Mashiro is… A new author, who aims to debut with an editor at her side.”

“Kanaria-chan called out to her, even though she sadly didn’t win the grand prize in the contest, because she felt something great from her. Now we’re aiming to make her win the next newcomer’s prize, chirp. Basically, Mashiro-chan’s talent came like radio waves flying out at me, giving Kanaria-chan a ‘Please scout me!’ call~”

Mashiro and Kanaria went on with their explanation without taking a single breath. Yeah, that’s what I was expecting.

“But, even though the deadline is right around the corner, Maki—Mashiro-chan hasn’t progressed at all with her novel, you know? That’s why Kanaria-chan took her here, chirp.”

“What do you mean…?”

“Being a super editor of Kanaria-chan’s level, she has several candidates for locations and rooms to confine—raise the motivation of our ‘sluggish’5 authors, chirp. With the dark and gloomy atmosphere of this inn in the Village Kageishi, it fits perfectly with Mashiro-chan’s novel.”

“So those words from the proprietress and the paper on the ‘Iris Room’ were—”

“Kanaria-chan asked her for this so that nobody would bother Mashiro-chan during her work.”

“And the ‘Canary Room’ is—”

“Since she had to rent a room every single time Kanaria-chan comes here with an author, she used her money to buy out a room here, and named it ‘Canary Room’, chirp.”

“The song I heard coming from your room just now was—”

“Since one of the authors Kanaria-chan works with wanted to use an original nursery rhyme, Kanaria-chan had no other choice but to work on it herself, chirp~ It’s a song about cute little birds, and the children in this village really love it, chirp! They’re even working on it for a school project, chirp!”

“So that’s what it waaaaaaaaaaaaaas~~~!”

Getting all sorts of logical and understandable reasons for the supernatural phenomena going on, I felt all the strength leave my body. Basically, this super idol of an editor, Kanaria, comes to this village on a frequent basis. As a consequence of that, she established a new culture here. A cursed children’s song? What kind of idiot am I?

“Ahahaha, to think that Aki would overthink it so much.”

“Ozu. You knew?”

“Thinking about it from a logical point of view, there’s no way there could be vengeful ghosts. The story about me hearing all of this from this imprisoned girl sounded interesting enough to become material for the game, so I thought of it.”

“Wahh, Onii-chan, you’re the worst! Just this once, I’m actually on Senpai’s side!”

“What are you talking about? I’d prefer it if you were actually thankful for what I did, Iroha.” Ozu continued with a teasing grin. “Because of this story about the ghost, you got to sleep in the same futon as Aki, right?”

“Wha…! Onii-chan?!”

“Ozu, you…You scared us just for something like that?”

“Well, I’m always happiest when I can see you two together, after all.” Baring his white teeth, Ozu gave us a handsome, scheming smile of a prince.

Yeah, right. He’s able to use his brain to its fullest in order to achieve his own goals, just like me. If his desire to have me marry Iroha really is as serious as he makes it sound, then going this far wouldn’t be anything out of the ordinary.

“Either way, I’m happy that this inn isn’t actually cursed or anything. Now I can finally get a good night’s sleep.”

“…Wait a second.”

“Hm, what’s wrong, Mashiro?”

Just as I sighed out of relaxation, Mashiro’s voice came out of nowhere. As I turned around, both her arms were shaking in anger.

“‘Sleep in the same futon’…What is this about, Aki?”

“…?!”

The room temperature just went down 2°C. A cold, almost freezing atmosphere emanated from Mashiro’s body, and her eyes were filled with an insane killing intent.

“Y-You’re wrong. Iroha’s sleeping habits are so bad that she just came rolling over into my futon, is all.”

“Eh, I slept in the same futon as Senpai? Don’t tell me, did we cross that line—”

“We didn’t cross anything! Also, don’t just go fishing in the trash can?!”

“There might be some proof hidden in there!”

“As if! Why do you have such an active imagination, you’re just a JK!”

“Ugh… Uuuuu~~~ Mashiro will also sleep in the same room as Aki…!” Puffing out her cheeks, Mashiro clung to my arm.

She must not want me to be alone with Iroha. But don’t worry, there’s nothing going on between us.

“Mashiro thought that she had to do her best, so she didn’t join you on the trip to the sea. But seeing you here, she can’t hold back. Just one night should be fine, right…, Hyawa?!”

“Maaashiro-chirp~”

Mashiro was lifted up by the collar, and slowly turned around.

“I-It’s late already, so can’t Mashiro just sleep here, in this room?”

“No can do~ You will be working on your manuscript in the other room, Sensei~”

“Nooooooooooooo! Let goooooooooo!”

“That being said, let’s split up for today, chirp. We’ll talk once the job is done~”

“O-Okay…bye?”

As I was perplexed to see such strength coming from such a small body, Kanaria started going back while pulling Mashiro with her, when she suddenly stopped and turned around.

“You are Aki-kun, right? Can Kanaria-chan ask you one question?”

“What? Ah, sure.”

“Kanaria-chan heard about your [5th Floor Alliance] from Mashiro-chan. The scenario you’re using is being written by Makigai Namako-sensei, right?”

“K-Kanaria-san, what are you—”

“Okay, keep quiet there, my sweet little Mashiro-chan. This is a talk between adults, chirp~”

“But…”

“And, am I right, AKI-kun?”

“…! Y-Yes, we are always in Makigai Namako-sensei’s care.”

I felt a chill, and sweat started building up on my forehead. Maybe she’s angry? About us asking for his help, even though he’s under Kanaria’s wing. Preparing for that, I made a fist with my hand.

“Ohh my, don’t make such a scared face~ It’s true that Kanari-chan is #angry that you kind of steal away Sensei’s time, but Kanaria-chan isn’t going to let it out on you, chirp. She knows that she can’t have Makigai Namako sensei all to herself~ But there was one thing that Kanaria-chan just had to ask, see~”

“And…what is that?”

“The reason that he decided to help out the [5th Floor Alliance], did he ever tell you?”

“…!” After a short break, I shook my head.

However, the question that she pointed at me stabbed me in the chest.

“Makigai Namako-sensei is probably helping you out for his own reasons. Maybe he likes the game, or maybe there’s a completely different reason for it. But does the [5th Floor Alliance] offer him anything other than that, chirp?”

“That is…”

I knew that. But I tried not to mind it too much.

Ozu had his own character and personality, making him unable to understand and sympathize with other people. He’d create things on his own, but might be unable to deliver them to others.

Murasaki Shikibu-sensei is tormented by her own family about becoming a teacher, unable to live her dream of being an illustrator.

Iroha can’t walk down the road of being an actor through the harsh regulations of her mother, not permitted to show all the skills she learned and acquired.

But Makigai Namako is different from them. He was a professional novel author to begin with, and we don’t know why he decided to support us. Naturally, he receives his own slice of the profit from the app, and we pay him for the manuscripts too. But instead of helping some small group with their mobile game, it would be much more efficient in a financial sense for him to focus on his career writing light novels. Either way, we’re basically spoiled by him, nothing more than that.

“If you really want Makigai Namako-sensei to continue working on your [5th Floor Alliance]’s project—” Kanaria pointed the tip of her umbrella at me.

“It would be good to think about something you can give Mash—Makigai Namako-sensei. UZA Publishing—No, I, Kiraboshi Kanaria, promised Sensei the greatest success and unfathomable honor. I will make her novel into a Hollywood movie and have everyone in the whole world know about it.”

“……”

A magnificent and splendid dream. No hesitation whatsoever in her eyes. No doubt she didn’t doubt Makigai Namako’s abilities and talents. The unwavering belief that Makigai Namako’s talent is worth showing to the entire world. And it wasn’t for no good reason.

Before I made my offer to Makigai Namako-sensei, I’d looked up this editor, Kiraboshi Kanaria. As it turned out, she’d written an essay called ‘The Way to Create Brilliance – Beautiful Word World’. In the essay, she writes about what she looks for in an aspiring author, how to draw out the talent they hold within, methods of advertisement, and even strategies for handling a comicalization or anime adaptation. Although it might make her sound like an idiot with a broken head on top of her shoulders, the true essence is outstanding. So much that I, a producer, have reread it several times already.

The person who wrote this essay managed to achieve reprintings for all the books she’s edited, a vast amount of different media adaptations for those books, and cumulative sales totaling around 30 million copies. Her success speaks for itself, really.

“You’d better give it a good thought, or we’ll take it all~” The girl gave an innocent smile.

But in the midst of that, I could sense that she was completely serious about this.

“Don’t forget that Kanaria-chan is your rival, okay? —AKI-kun~”

Leaving those words behind, the girl stepped out of the room, taking Mashiro with her.

“……”

“…Senpai, you okay?”

Having stayed silent the whole time, Iroha came over, worry filling her expression.

“Yeah… For now.”

“Don’t mind it too much. From what we can see on LIME, we’re already close buddies with Makigai Namako-sensei. She won’t just leave Senpai al—”

“Thanks for that, Iroha. But I don’t need this. After all, this Kanaria has a reason there.”

Up until now, I’ve encountered many ‘Amazing Adults’.

There’s Tsukinomori Makoto, the representative company president of Honey Play Works. I don’t stand a chance against him yet, in terms of being a leader.

In addition, there’s Amachi Otoha, the representative company president of Tenchidou. A marketer who brought the business to success through efficiency, and in terms of being a data scientist, I can’t hope to win against her yet.

And now, there’s Kiraboshi Kanaria. Against her talent in terms of producing other talents and slumbering genius, I probably wouldn’t be able to win against her either. She stands within the world we’re aiming for, and someone I have to surpass eventually.

“Rather, it was a great wake-up call… I really have to give this more thought.”

“Senpai…?”

Iroha gazed at me, a glimmer of worry in her eye, as I made up my resolve.

I can’t be satisfied with just the [5th Floor Alliance] as it is now. If the day comes where Ozu, Sumire, or Iroha don’t need the box called [5th Floor Alliance] anymore, I need to prepare things that make them want to continue being apart of this [5th Floor Alliance]. I don’t want to be the one without a job. I can’t just rest easy with my position as a friend, spoiled by their talent. And the first step towards that is thinking of a benefit I can promise Makigai Namako so that he won’t leave us.

At the same time, I also thought about the reason I came to the Village Kageishi in the first place. About the current head of the Kageishi Family, Kageishi Kou. Now that I’m in contact with him, I should use the most efficient method I have to strike him down. By doing so, Sumire will be able to reveal herself as the illustrator Murasaki Shikibu-sensei and walk down the path of being an illustrator. I don’t know if she’ll still decide to stay with the [5th Floor Alliance], but even so, as her producer, I have to do this no matter what. Meaning that I have to make the ‘Ceremony of Marriage’ tomorrow a success and gain the trust of Kageishi Kou.

—All in order so that she can stop being a teacher.

*

「I really don’t feel like I’ll ever have a reason to separate from you, Aki」

「I know that, but…」

「You won’t be satisfied with just that, I know」

「I’m not trying to sound cool or anything. I just can’t trust a relationship that’s not based on an exchange of debts. All there is to it」

「Hehe, isn’t that fine? I really like that part about you, Aki」

1 のろい is being used, so Aki assumes it comes from 呪い(noroi/curse)

2https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_wise_monkeyshttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_wise_monkeys

3 Banchou Sara Yashiki: Maid Okiku is blamed for losing a plate, and killed. Hence the counting I think?

4 It’s 菖蒲の間 (Ayame no Ma/Iris Room), but Ozu is saying it as 殺める (ayameru/to murder)

5 The word she uses can also mean curse if written in different kanji